It's hard to keep track of where Samantha Markle stands with her half-sister, the Duchess of Sussex, on any given day.
Ever since Meghan Markle's engagement to Prince Harry was announced, the former Suits star's older and clearly estranged sibling has been on one hell of a crusade to take her down and get herself some press in the process. But in that time, the elder Markle's feelings towards her sister have shifted with such regularity that it's enough to make your head spin. Last week, she was apologizing to Meghan and her husband for "past misunderstandings" in light of her sister's pregnancy announcement, while also somewhat ironically saying that "Everybody just needs to shut the heck up and let this be a great thing for them."
And this week? She's branded her a liar after asserting that a speech Meghan delivered at University of the South Pacific in Fiji that touched on her own higher education history had distorted the truth. So much for shutting the heck up.
So, in the spirit of accountability, something that Samantha clearly likes to hold her sister to, we present a complete timeline of everything she's ever said in this very one-sided war of words.
November 2016
Seemingly apropos of nothing—and a full year before royal couple announced their engagement—Samantha began her crusade in earnest on Twitter, reportedly writing, "The Royal Family would be appalled by what she's done to her own family. The truth would kill her relationship with Prince Harry, he wouldn't want to date her anymore because it puts her in a bad public light."
In an interview with The Sun, Samantha, who was diagnosed with MS in 2008 and since been confined to a wheelchair, admitted that she'd had little contact with her sister over the last decade. "Hollywood has changed her," she said. "I think her ambition is to become a princess."
Three weeks later, in an interview with Entertainment Tonight, Samantha changed her tune, praising her for being "studious" and "world traveled." "She's got the eloquence of a Condoleezza Rice, and the grace of Princess Diana," she added.
January 2017
After Meghan embarked on a week-long trip to India in honor of World Vision Canada, an organization that works to support and sponsor children and families living in poverty around the world, Samantha slammed her humanitarian efforts, reportedly tweeting, "When people are starving or dying of thirst, it is an insult to use one's voice—exploitation. Go to the desert with a truck full of water when people are dying and offer them your voice."
And when she was called out for the strange reaction, she replied, "She is the one with the hardened heart. I've always been supportive of her but I won't enable the lies and hypocrisy."
March 2017
After Meghan's pal Serena Williams praised her on Twitter for an article about period poverty she'd written in Time for International Women's Day, Samantha tweeted, "But what did she donate to them to make real chance come about? Money for toilets, maxi pads, or just a photo op?" Around the same time, she also belittled Meghan's acting career, tweeting, "You mean the 'job' on 90210?" and alleged that Meghan "ignored a sister in a wheelchair because it is an embarrassment to her." This was also when Samantha floated the idea about her tell-all book for the first time, tweeting, "Excited about my book 'The Diary of Princess Pushy's Sister.'"
April 2017
Samantha clarified the scope of her book in an exclusive interview with The Daily Star, saying ""My book deals with my bi-racial family in a candid, warm, personal and socially important way. Maybe when Meghan is more mature and reads the book she'll understand. Some of it she won't like, some of it she might."
September 2017
Samantha's pitch to publishers for her book, written in April, is revealed in Page Six. In it, he says that her book "Illustrates the evolution of my biracial lens since my birth in the '60s, the bigoted underpinnings in my own family that echoed in my mind as a child while I defended [the idea] that there is no such thing as ‘color,' only fear and hatred that people like my own grandmother were taught in the uneducated and insecurity-based pockets of America and the world."
"When my biracial sister was born, I would be forever ‘color blind,'" the pitch continued. "If only I could predict the media frenzy and racial slurs that would occur as a direct result of my beautiful baby sister possibly becoming the first biracial princess or duchess in royal history. Little did I know that I would stand looking back over my shoulder at how far we've come in the world towards true multiracial and multicultural appreciation, contrasted with how far we have to go in our evolution towards Dr. Martin Luther King's Dream."
November 2017
Following Meghan and Harry's engagement announcement on November 27, Samantha spoke with Us Weekly about what was really important: How the good news made her feel. "It was really exciting for me, I am so happy for her," she said. "It was kind of funny, it was like my boyfriend showed it to me and I was on the phone with my father and I got to let him know too. We didn't know it was going to come out this soon, so it was nice to wake up to."
In the same interview, she attempted to downplay her estrangement with Meghan while also shifting blame for her nastier tirades on the media. "It's been such a whirlwind with us and I'm sad she believed some of the other interviews I did where words I never said were taken out of context, so it's been a bit since we've spoken," she told the publication.
December 2017
After Prince Harry referred to the royals as "the family that I suppose [Meghan's] never had" during a BBC radio interview, Samantha snapped back—where else?—on Twitter. "Actually she has a large family who were always there with her and for her. Our household was very normal and when dad and Doria divorced, we all made it so it was like she had two houses. No one was estranged ,she was just too busy. Read my book complete with facts and photos," she wrote. "Meg's family(our family) is complete with sister, brother,aunts, uncles, cousins, and the glue of our family, our amazing completely self-sacrificing father. She always had this family,..Marrying merely extends it."
January 2018
In an interview with InTouch, despite referring to Meghan as "extremely well-behaved and respectful" and "diplomatic" as a child, Samantha slammed her half-sister's beloved mother Doria Ragland for "just shut[ing] everyone out" after her daughter began dating Harry in 2016. "In my mind Doria wanted to run around and seal off all the hatches. She became very possessive and controlling," she said, in essence blaming the estrangement on her. She also took issue with the Ralph & Russo dress Meghan wore in the engagement photo shoot, claiming, "If you can spend $75,000 on a dress, you can spend $75,000 on your dad."
April 2018
Samantha took to Twitter to assert that the entire Markle family had not yet been invited to the wedding, something she, naturally, took great umbrage with. "The Markle family is looking forward to our wedding invites. No-one has one yet," she wrote in one tweet. "Still waiting. I hope London is wheelchair friendly. Excited!" She followed that up with, "At issue is not a matter of closeness as more than 1000 complete strangers are invited. Family is family. I have an uncle I have only seen once by I would never say he is not family because we are not close. Humanitarians move forward with love and kindness especially to family." And followed that with, "Smoke and mirrors cannot hide the elephant in the room. Out of respect, tradition and humanitarianism, the #Markles should be invited if 2,000 complete strangers are invited. Our uncle who got her the internship, brother, me, best friend of 30 years Nikki Priddy, nephews. Fact."
That same month, she urged Prince Harry "man up" on Twitter, adding, :'Shout outs' about humanitarianism, don't work when you are allowing Meg to ignore the Markles. It is s contradiction. Someone must point out that the ‘Emperor [sic] is not wearing any clothes.'" She also took aim at the spectacle surrounding the big event itself, tweeting, "For the Royal wedding, instead of shuffling homeless people to the outskirts of Windsor, there should be a tented area with steak dinners, music, job corps and housing representatives, set up to improve their lives. Homeless people are human. Treat them with dignity. Namaste."
May 2018
In the ramp-up to the wedding, Samantha takes the blame for arranging the supposedly candid paparazzi photos of her father Thomas Markle. "The bad press over my father doing staged photos is my fault. The media was unfairly making him look bad so I suggested he do positive photos for his benefit and the benefit of the royal family," she tweeted. "We had no idea he would be taken advantage of. It was not for money."
She then told the Daily Mail, "It was not money-motivated," adding, "I have no idea [if he was paid] but if he was it would have been a pittance. They don't pay that much." Around this time, she also changed her story about the last time she'd spoken to Meghan, saying that it had only been since 2015 and not 2008, as previously claimed.
During a heated exchange with Piers Morgan on Good Morning Britain, she defended the way she'd spoken about Meghan: "I think anyone who understands the English language and looks at what I've said verbatim would realize that I've said lovely things about [Meghan]. But if there was a behavior or situation that I questioned, I think I was honest and fair about targeting the situation or the behavior and not her."
Speaking with TMZ, she made clear she would be ignoring the Palace's wishes to keep her mouth shut. "There's something in this country known as free speech," she told the outlet. "[Meghan] doesn't have a copyright on that and she's not going to tell me that I can't speak my own life or my father's where it's a matter of public self defense because the media is disparaging us." That same day, she appeared on Channel 4's "Meet the Markles," admitting she didn't "expect or demand" an invitation to the wedding.
Days after the wedding, Samantha spoke with The Sun to rip apart Meghan and Harry yet again, angry now that there was no public statement read about Thomas at the wedding he was forced to miss. "I know the day is about Meghan and Harry but, had Charles been in hospital with a heart attack, I think there would have been statements released expressing their sadness that he wasn't there," she said. "I watched the bishop talk about love and unity and forgiveness and I hoped it would strike a chord within Meghan. So if that was real and if I were to define a principle to all of this then it would be that we all just work for a peaceful resolution and reunion as a family. I feel a religious and moral obligation to be open to her and not be vindictive or isolating or hurt."
She was also furious over reports that Thomas would not get a coat of arms, unlike other fathers of commoners who marry a royal. "To exclude him off a coat of arms is really stripping him of an honour and it's a huge insult. After a heart attack that would be cruel and isolating," she said before going in on the royal family. "The royals had generations of scandal in their own family. You've got inbreeding, you've got substance abuse, you've got alcohol abuse, you've got infidelity. On what grounds could the royals feel that the Markles are somehow not worthy? That's the pot calling the kettle black."
July 2018
In another Twitter rant, Samantha called Harry "a 'wuss'" for allowing "the Duchess of Nonsense to mistreat everyone who has been close to her, especially her family." "Diana would be ashamed," she continued, before imploring that he stop wearing "Meg's skivvies and bra and take your pants off of her!" She also shared a photo of Harry's ex Cressida Bonas, saying "she is much more like Diana. That's who Harry should have married."
She also took aim at Meghan, as well, tweeting, "How about you pay tribute to your own father?! Enough is enough. Act like a humanitarian act like a woman! If our father dies I'm holding you responsible, Meg!"
August 2018
Sharing an Elle article that said Meghan and Harry were "rumored to be taking a step away from the media spotlight," Samantha called her "Cruella Deville" and "Witchy Poo" in separate tweets.
September 2018
At the end of the month, Samantha's publicist Rob Cooper—because of course, by this time, she would need a publicist—announced to the world that his client was heading to the UK to attempt and confront Meghan. "After making numerous attempts in private to arrange a one on one meeting with The Duchess of Sussex to discuss their 74 year old father's health, Kensington Palace have refused to respond," he tweeted. "I fear Meghan may not be made aware of these discreet attempts and therefore making this public is the only option we have left. I currently have Samantha in Europe with just one short flight away. This DOESN'T need to be public, we would prefer to keep this private. Samantha is coming to the UK this week, like it or not."
October 2018
After being shunned in London, Samantha sat down for an interview on October 1 with Channel 5's Jeremy Vine, where she actually apologized to Meghan, saying, 'I wish things could be different." As the host remained dubious of her motivations, she countered, "I wonder how you would feel. Is it more insulting that people would respond to feeling disregarded and feeling ignored or is best that everyone just continues saying nothing? In the beginning, when we spoke publicly, I thought we were being openhearted and even favorable. That fell on deaf ears, and the media turned it into something that it was not." As for her insulting tweets/ "I'm a bit of a quick wit," she said. "I worked in broadcasting and radio for a while, and I have always been a bit boisterous. But I think I said that at a point which seemed inescapable."
Three days later, she was back to attacking Meghan on Twitter. "You have no idea what is going on behind the scenes. She ignored my father through a heart attack. There is no excuse for it," she shared with one follower. "You would be mentally ill to think that is OK. Maybe you were the one who needs the counseling."
"She has ghosted both sides of the family. She needs to earn our trust," she continued. "It is the other way around. You don't crap on an entire family and then run around crying that you cannot trust everyone."
Days later, she was photographed outside Kensington Palace, where she handed over a letter addressed to Meghan before being turned away. Upon returning home to Ocala, Fla., she sat for a satellite interview with DailyMailTV and attempted to downplay the photo. "I was not turned away from Kensington Palace. I'm pretty composed. I'm pretty mature. For all the PR and the public to say I was 'demanding' to see my sister? First of all, I'm not that tacky and rude—and I wouldn't just show up," she said. In general, Samantha added she's "not the kind of person that's turned away" from places.
She also spoke directly to Meghan, saying, "Let's just cut through all the crap. You're a woman. Life is short. I believe you have it in your heart to do the right thing here. You know dad loves you. You know he's been there for you more than anyone. So, don't [believe] this public monster and misperception that he's a 'sperm donor dad' trying to be involved all of a sudden."
The following week, after the baby announcement, Samantha spoke with The Sun, saying, "It just makes everything that happened over the last year disappear. I want Meghan to be happy and calm and have peace. Everybody needs to be positive." However, she still took great offense to the Palace omitting Thomas from the official announcement while mentioning Doria, saying she hoped it was "not intentional" and that he would be "included and at a proper time."
"If he is excluded, I won't be happy. It is in the best interests of the baby for my dad to be included," she threatened.
She then spoke with DailyMailTV about the pregnancy, saying, "Everybody just needs to shut the heck up and let this be a great thing for them, for the world, for the family and that's where I'm at. It's so important that everybody put their egos aside. Meghan's done some things with my dad, but in my heart, I love her and I want her and the baby to do well. I was kind of overwhelmed with emotion [when I heard] and I just thought, I'm letting everything go. It's beautiful and I'm so excited for Harry too."
Speaking directly to Meghan and Harry, she issued yet another apology for past tension. "I'm so excited, I'm so happy for you and I really, really am sorry for any of the past tension and confusion and misunderstandings and asinine things I've said when I just didn't understand what was going on and I wanted things to work out for my dad," Samantha said. "But this is just a great time for you guys and Meg, I love you. Congratulations to both of you. Let's just let it all go and you two be wonderful happy parents – I'm so happy for both of you."
And then, of course, she seemed to completely go back on her word on October 24 when she slammed Meghan's speech at the University of the South Pacific on Fiji.
"Our father paid for all of her education! This speech is not true," she tweeted.
"Stop the enabling!" she continued. "Do not ever reward a lie it does not matter how fluffy it is! It is wrong and there is no force on the planet that will take this away from my father. She should inspire women with the truth and with gratitude! Roll [sic] model thankfullness and truth, not lies."
What will she say next? Stay tuned.