Remind us to never eat eggs or order cheese with Carole Radziwill.
She joined Tinsley Mortimer for a breakfast date and it was just weird from beginning to end, in a way that's made it impossible for us to stop thinking about it. Normally, we think of Carole as the sane(ish) one. She's the one who dresses up as Amelia Earhart and runs marathons. She's reasonable! She should know how to order eggs!
And yet tonight, we discovered that she does not know how to order eggs. Either she was really California jet lagged or she's really going through something with Adam dating someone else, because how else do you explain her waltzing in late, wearing glamorous PJs fashioned with a gold belt thing, and then demanding the oddest breakfast order we've ever heard?
"I want three eggs any style," she declared. "I'm not sure of the style. What are my options?"
After hearing some options, of which hard-boiled was not one, she asked if she could get them hard-boiled.
"But three hard-boiled is a lot. Two. Two hard boiled. I'm sorry, one hard-boiled, and then other two in my order, can those be scrambled? And can you mix the scrambled part? Don't make it touch the hard-boiled egg part. I want that hard-boiled. I love this place!"
Then it was Tinsley's turn. Or was it?!
"May I just have the avocado toast please?"
The waitress then informed Tinsley, the orderer of the food, that the avocado toast comes with cheese.
"No cheese!" Carole exclaimed in disgust before Tinsley even had a chance.
"What, was that like a hint?" Tinsley asked, but all Carole could say was "I'm so happy to see you!"
Then it was down to talking about Scott surprising Tinsley in last week's episode, and there was drama to be had with Bethenny and Dorinda's trip to Puerto Rico. But throughout all of it, all we could think about was Carole's egg order and her strange cheese aversion.
Have you never enjoyed an avocado toast with a nice chunk of burrata, Carole?! Or a good poached egg?
Actually though, we had to pay attention to Dorinda and Bethenny, because Dorinda realllllly screwed the pooch. She and Bethenny made it to Miami to meet up with Bethenny's team, and B was so excited to show off all her relief efforts. Then Dorinda went and got real drunk and acted like a real jerk, obnoxiously doubting the possibility that a kid could go to college after surviving a disaster.
Bethenny told her she didn't want her to continue on to Puerto Rico with them, and Dorinda stomped off, leaving Bethenny to have to explain what the heck just happened to the rest of the table. But she forgave pretty quickly, saying Dorinda would definitely regret it in the morning.
Dorinda ended up going along to Puerto Rico anyway, admitting she shouldn't have even gone to the dinner but she was ready for a new day.
On the plane, Bethenny told Dorinda she was "a drunk," which Dorinda denied, but did say she uses alcohol as an excuse to "exhibit bad behavior."
"Bethenny likes to label people," Dorinda said later, which is true, but can we also admit that based on all the evidence just in this season alone, Dorinda may also need to chill out on the alcohol?
Anyway, TWO SCRAMBLED EGGS AND ONE HARD-BOILED AND NO TOUCHING. We'll never forget and we'll never get over it.
The Real Housewives of New York City airs Wednesdays at 9 p.m. on Bravo.