We did not see that coming!

Riverdale finally (finally finally) returned tonight, and most of the premiere was not all that much of a shock. Then we got to the end, when none other than Miss Grundy (Sarah Habel) showed right back up to get murdered. 

She was living across the river in Greendale, still up to her predatory ways. She was working with a student in her home, then kissed him goodbye (in a sexy and disgusting way) before sending him home. And then she turned around, only to discover the masked man there ready to strangle her. She dead! No more Miss Grundy! 

We feel no sadness at the loss of Miss Grundy, but someone else does. 

"I've noticed that a lot of the fans aren't too keen on Miss Grundy and a lot of the fans really don't like the storyline between her and Archie, but I really did enjoy that storyline. I thought it was great," star KJ Apa told E! News. "So I was excited to have her back! I was really psyched, and then obviously with what happened...yeah." 

Obviously, what happened was her murder, and when Archie finds out about it, he's not going to take it well. 

"I think Archie, he loved Miss Grundy—or he thought he loved Miss Grundy—so with her being murdered, again, it kind of makes his quest to find revenge for his dad that much more intense."


The CW

Miss Grundy's tragic(?) death was just one small part of that premiere. It started immediately after Fred's (Luke Perry) shooting, with Archie (who doesn't even have a drivers' license!) driving his dad to the hospital. Fred immediately went into surgery and Archie started calling everyone he knew, and all his friends paused their own problems to help him out.

Betty (Lili Reinhart) and Jughead (Cole Sprouse) took charge of searching for Fred's wallet, which went missing during the shooting though no other money was stolen from Pop's, and while they searched, they tried to work through the reality of Jughead's new life with a motorcycle and serpent friends who will torture people in Jughead's honor to get info about who shot Fred. 

Veronica (Camila Mendes) did her best to comfort Archie, even when he acted like he didn't want her comfort at all, and even with the looming return of her father hanging over everything.Obviously that comforting resulted in some steamy shower sex, and while it seemed like a weird time for that, it was still fun and steamy.

Cheryl (Madelaine Petsch) also spent some time at the hospital, but only because that's where her mother ended up after the fire at Thornhill, which Cheryl started herself. But it was a terrible accident, of course! Cheryl went full crazy pants, hissing to her mother that after all these years of emotional abuse, it was Cheryl's turn to be in charge, but only in the creepiest way possible. "If you breathe it's only because I give you air. If you drink, it's only because I poured your cup myself. And if you move? It is quietly, and with my blessing." Such nice mother/daughter bonding!


The CW

Fred spent the episode coma-dreaming about milestones in Archie's life: His graduation, proposing to Veronica, getting married to Veronica (in a kilt! Teen Outlander strikes again!), but then inside his dream, Fred would realize he was actually dead. But he wasn't dead, thank goodness. He's alive, if not well, so we can all rest easy about that one particular thing for now, even if Archie can't. He's apparently staying up all night with a baseball bat in his hand in case the guy in the hood shows up again.

Meanwhile, Hiram Lodge (Mark Consuelos) finally made his arrival, and suddenly the Lodge family got a whole lot creepier than they were last season, especially when it comes to Hermione (Marisol Nichols). She seemed like kind of a cool mom in season one (at least compared to Alice, aside from forging her daughter's signature), but she's got a whole new element to her when Hiram's on his way. How dare Veronica drink the Cristal! She was saving that for Veronica's father!

Hiram mostly just sat at the head of the dining room table, fully in shadows, and chastised Veronica for not being home to greet him. So far, not a fan of this man.

K.J. Apa, Camila Mendes, Riverdale

The CW

And that's where we are! Who would want to kill both Fred and Miss Grundy? Is Cheryl going to be OK? Is Archie going to be OK? What kind of havoc is Hiram gonna wreak? Has anyone given Pop Tate a hug yet ‘cause he kind of seems like he could use one. 

Jughead's Weirdo Line of the Week: *gravelly voice* "In times of crisis, some people lose their appetite. But me? Mine increases tenfold."

Riverdale airs Wednesdays at 8 p.m. on the CW. 

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