by Ted Casablanca | Wed., Apr. 4, 2012 1:26 PM
You are so FOS. Check Katy Perry's Twitter before writing B.S. Katy was on a plane to Tokyo after the KCAs Saturday and not hanging out at the Chateau with Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. Therefore this outing never happened. You got the wrong information again, sweetie.
—Caught in a Lie
Dear Ms. Informed:
Sweetie, forgive me, I didn't know you personally prepared Katy's travel itinerary! Katy went from the Kids' Choice Awards to the Chateau—where, yes, she met up with her pals R.Pattz and K.Stew—and then got on a flight bound for Japan later that night (which she tweeted about the next day). There is no overlap in the timeline. Smooches!
Dear Kissing for the Camera:
Minka and Derek are (allegedly) over, Mindy—how many times have we heard that?—so he shouldn't care one way or another who Ms. Kelly chooses to get flirty with. And if he is jealous, all the better, no?
I find it sad when a lead on a series makes it absolutely awful for the rest of the cast and crew to enjoy the experience. So many shows get canceled nowadays—you'd think one would appreciate the chance of getting regularly paid for acting! And as if long hours on a set are not hard at times on people's morale. That being said, tell us Oh Sexy Beast, is Harriet Talons on a reality-scripted show or a drama-scripted show? And is it cable dirty? Much love to your four-legged fam.
Dear Silver Screen Satan:
You'd think, wouldn't ya. But some actors are so self-centered they don't realize how miserable they're making the experience for those lowly crew folk. As for nasty ol' Talons, she works on network drama, Rita. With an emphasis on drama.
Does David Fincher have a Blind Vice? Feature in one? The fellow who directed such pervy movies as Fight Club and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo has got to have some secrets. My two kitties say hi!
Dear Feeling Sexy:
A cameo of sorts, MJ, with a sexy Vice star (though his guest-starring role isn't very sexy at all).
Any update on our favorite toking trio Buella Bland, Kelly Guten-Shoes and Drew Smolder 'n' Such? Have any of the three moved onto juicier Vices? Or has the group kept it tame behind the scenes? Maybe their show has been canceled...Thanks for continuing the spread the message about rescuing pets.
Dear Three's a Crowd:
It's more about Buella and Kelly these days—sorry poor little Drew! And while the trio spark rumors of far naughtier deeds, they never live up to Vice hype (i.e. no, their secrets aren't exactly more sordid than last time we checked in on them). As for their show, it's still going strong.
Just started reading the very dirty Fifty Shades of Grey and I had a great pick for who could play Christian. How about Michael Fassbender?
Dear Fifty Shades of Shame:
Sorry, Brandi, but Fassy won't be unleashing his member on this big screen again anytime soon. Let's hold each other while we cry, 'k?