Blind Vice: Will Dazzling Sissi Sparkle's Secrets Come Out?

Subtle machinations continue to cover up the star's athletic and lesbian love life

By Ted Casablanca Mar 09, 2012 6:45 PMTags
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There's something to be said for gals—gay and straight—who have very religious upbringings. When it comes to sex, they tend to lean heavily in one direction or the other. Usually nothing vanilla or boring between the sheets with belting, church-going gals who call Jesus their BFF!

Certainly is the case with hugely talented star Sissi Sparkle, who has everybody wondering lately...

"Has she ever had a girlfriend?" many are starting to ask, since fans are just now (stupidly) waking up to the fact that Sissi never really has had much of a man in her life—apart from some silly flirtations here and there.

True, there was the one guy a long time ago, but, he was just a cover-up, people!

But recently, Sissi's been in the news in a pretty major way. She's big on the celeb radar again—very big.

So it's no wonder folks are starting to wonder—in some cases, not for the first time—where the hell is the man in this multitalented powerhouse's existence?

Answer: paid to further Sissi's fabulous-again career!

‘Cause it was always the ladies who did it for Sissi. Always.

And, damn, do the girls who lived to tell about their wild sex times have a lot to say about it!

(But they never will.)

AND IT AIN'T: Dolly Parton, Jennifer Hudson, Britney Spears