Olivia Munn, Justin Timberlake, Olivia Wilde

Jason Merritt/Getty Images; Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images; Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
I just read that Justin Timberlake was seen with Olivia Munn. I'm hoping this was a business meeting and nothing more because I really wanted to see him with Mila Kunis. What can you tell us?

Dear Wrong Olivia:
You mean Olivia Wilde, right? Because that's the Olivia he has recently been linked to. Supposedly the two were snuggling at the Roxbury. But during that whole breakup fiasco with Jessica Biel, everyone was whispering that Justin was totally behind-the-back texting Ms. Munn. Yuck. Isn't she with Matthew Morrison, or some other very public dude? Standards. All this just proves Mila's too classy for the J.T. double-dipping crap.

Dear Ted:
Just been reading the Daily Mirror and they have an article on Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart splitting up. What is your take on this and please don't quote "Daily Mirror really?" Where there is smoke, there is fire. What I want to know is what is your take on this.

Dear Gimme a Break:
Daily Mirror
, really? (Besides, I'm told they're cool).

Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong Tom Hardy?

Dear Hardly:
Nope. Not him, either. Think less typical hotness.

Dear Ted:
I think Olivia Wilde would be a terrific candidate to play Elizabeth Taylor. Besides being a good actress, she's got the same kind of drop-dead gorgeous looks Miss Taylor had. Your thoughts?
—Thirteen Is a Ten

Dear Wilde About It:
I gotta say, I kinda love it. I hadn't even really considered her. Probably because she doesn't really have the acting repertoire like some of the big-time suggestions I dropped earlier this week. But if we can consider Megan Fox, we can sure as hell consider Wilde. She's smoking and bossy, to boot, as long as Justin isn't really her current man candy.

Dear Ted:
Why you always putting Twilight and The Hunger Games against each other?

Dear Sci-Furious:
How can I not? And I mean, it's not pitting them against each other per se. It is a reasonable comparison, especially because the casting of The Hunger Games is about as dramatic as Rob and Kristen's "hot-and-cold, on-a-break" relaysh. I'll stop when everyone quits being interested in all this mythical stuff. It's a bit cryptic at times. Twilight that is!

Dear Ted:
I know we usually talk about romances and showmances, but here's a potential bromance for you: Jake Gyllenhaal and Orlando Bloom. Both are Buddhist, both are often seen riding bikes or motorcycles, both live and work in Hollywood. Don't you think they'd make a great friendship? Or are their Vices in the way? The rescues all send kisses!

Dear Bros Over Shows:
Jake and Orlando? Talk about a beautiful bromance. And if anything, their Vices bring them closer together. Thing is, that is too much pretty boy for one successful friendship. I can already smell the jealousy. Plus, Orli has a fam to take care of, while Jakey is roaming the restaurants with some mystery blondes. Not quite the same lifestyle. Still, you're right, though. Kisses to your pooches!

Dear Ted:
Not gonna lie, super pissed about The Hunger Games casting. What are your thoughts?

Dear Pretty Pissed:
That you're pissed! We told you Liam's Gale and Josh's Peeta will work if you let it. You can't say both dudes aren't total lookers who are pretty individual. Plus, I personally loved Josh in The Kids Are All Right. And as much as almost everyone will argue against it, I think Jennifer Lawrence and Liam have just the right amount of resemblance to play Katniss and Gale. That and we just want that hot piece of an Aussie to put Miley's acting to even more shame. Let's wait before we rate their Hunger Game abilities!

Dear Ted:
Is Toothy Tile a college drop-out by any chance?

Dear Education Smeducation:
Why not just ask his name?

Dear Ted:
What a very sad Blind Vice last Friday. I genuinely feel for everyone involved! My question is: Does Percy DuBois have any skeletons in the closet? Also, has he been on your Vice radar screen for a while now?

Dear Brand Sad and New:
Really, the situation is so sad. It's still eating away at me. But I'd say Percy has some secrets—nothing worth hiding away in a closet. He's pretty public about crap—just cold when he addresses it. And he's definitely new on my Vice radar. His ex, on the other hand, she's attached to a few Vicers here and there.

Dear Ted:
I have a guess as to the identity of Cookie Muncher, but I also have one request. If you laugh so hard that you fall off of your chair when you read this, would you please not tell me that in your response? Is Cookie Muncher Heidi Klum?

Dear Still Sitting:
Why would I laugh? This is an excellent wrong answer. Sorry, hon. Keep chewing on it. And didn't I already say it's not her?

Dear Ted:
So, Lily Collins got cast as Snow White, what happened to Kristen Stewart getting the role? Another lie. Great job.

Dear Another Movie:
Kristen is playing Snow White in Snow White and the Huntsman, not Snow White. Different movies completely, hon! Lily's Snow White is attempting to push a release date before Kristen's for obvious reasons. The gal must be worried K.Stew will steal her fairest-off-them-all shine. Can't wait to compare these beauts! Probably as much as you can't wait to catch me on my next "lie."

Dear Ted:
Is Cookie Muncher Reese Witherspoon?

Dear Good Girl:
You are taking the road less traveled, and I like it. But Cookie is still not Reese. You are somewhat close, though. Both she and Cookie are over loving on actors who have given them grief in the past. Strictly offscreen romancing now.

Dear Ted:
Stories like Sally Pearlsmyth and Percy DuBois make me so sad for young Hollywood. No one should ever be talked into ending a pregnancy. Besides, plenty of actors have babies young and it doesn't ruin their career...just ask Reese Witherspoon! It makes me think Sally must be in a line of work that wouldn't be easy to schedule around, like TV acting. Could this be Jessica Szohr and Ed Westwick from Gossip Girl?

Dear What a Snout:
You are so close it hurts. Don't you hate when that happens? Sally and Percy are bigger than just TV, though.

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