So, to start, we’re zeroing in on near size-zero Eva Longoria, who has decided to put her petite booty to use and unveil a new Hell-Ay nightclub called Beso, set to open late this summer. Following are the Sick-Sick Six reasons why we’re breathlessly waiting for our invites and wishing Eva-love every success:
6. Face it, we’re celeb whores who will go to any opening, even for Candy Spelling’s new mah-jongg jewelry line (of course I’ll be there!).
4. We're dying to see if Tony Parker raps better than in his music video. K-Fed redux?
3. Here’s hoping it will make Hyde slowly disappear, like Nicole Richie.
2. Beso, natch, means kiss in Spanish, and nobody smooches red carpet ass better than Eva.
1. Dubya needs another place where he can pretend to drink nonalcoholic beer!
Living here in La-La Land, you can’t go anywhere without someone mentioning Paris Hilton, so I had to ask good girls Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge to dish on the recent drama.
“I feel bad for her...but you know, you’ve got to face the consequences,” said sweet little Audrina. “They’re making an example of her,” L.C. offered. “I mean, it goes both ways. You can’t have this attitude that nothing’s going to happen to you if you do something wrong, but at the same time, there are people out there that are getting away with much more and not going to jail.” Such a PC answer, Laur! You been hangin’ with Kathy Hilton, or somethin’?
Is that woman on crack? You gotta be kidding me—life without Paris is like epithets without Isaiah!