Forgive? Fuhgeddaboudit!

As Tyra makes enemies by movin’ her show across the coast, Brad might finally feel remorse for leaving America’s fave Friend. Plus, Obama kicks his nasty habit in the butt, while Dubya can no longer deny his. The proof’s in the pics!

Apparently, Tyra Banks and I aren't the only girls losing our more sensible heads to men 'n' such these days. I swear, I'm in such a lusty dither, I'm just going to give it to y'all bullet-style today—forget about proper sentence structure (like I ever do that!):

•  Barack Obama has quit...smoking, that is. What a smart move, as the serious stumping is about to kick into high gear (Hillary prefers "a good bra" for said stressful sitches, as I've exclusively reported in these push-up pages), and we can't have the guy who's promoting universal health care contributing to his own demise with ciggies, right?

Barack was at a Hell-Ay gas station Tuesday ayem, giving a press conference. Seems like an odd location, but this par-tick pumping station offers biodiesel, an alternative fuel. A journalist asked if he was still smoking, when B.O. (what unfortunate initials, eh?) proudly declared he'd kicked the nasty butt habit. B-man was even kind enough to share his cessation secret: Nicorette gum. "Here, have some!" he offered, taking a pack from his pocket and tossing it to the reporter. Obama also claimed he only smoked "three to four a day"...but did he inhale? By the by, Mr. O., you're just replacing your addiction with another (equally pricey) one. Try acupuncture, worked for me.

•  Brad Pitt may have seen the error of his spouse-dumping ways, as those who have traveled right beside Pitt & Co. (that would, uh, include my fave boyfriend ever, George Clooney) are insisting to moi that Mr. Pee is now—at this incredibly late stage—perhaps regretting the harshness with which he chose to leave Jen and hook up with Angie. Oh, I'm sure Jennifer's just gonna forgive and forget, Braddie-poo! And Paris isn't getting hit on in jail as we goss!

•  Note to Johnny Depp: Know that compound you've got round Devon, England? Where you're currently building a fab new mansion? Take a look over at your neighboring farm, the one that was just sold. Your new nabes are expecting tea and crumpets, once they move in, as your nearby little bum was utilized as a major (and very lucrative) selling point. Just thought ya should know.

•  Nudge to Awful Truth regulars: See those photos and video, as of late, with Dubya, our pummeling Prez, taking international chugs of beer? Gosh, wonder who told you that nasty off-the-wagon biz was taking place and driving his wife-unit, Laura, outta 1600 Pennsylvania in the pross? "She's still living elsewhere," reports my always accurate Desk DeeCee, for the updating record, regarding whether Ms. Bee's still only officing—and not sleeping—at the White House.

•  While my fave baddie Bel-Air mama, Kathy Hilton, continues to rule the chosen paparazzi who do—and do not—get access to her fam's precious Paris bites (I kid you not, how the hell do you think us nefarious flamers get our s--t, anyway?), Michelle Rodriguez, little girl Lost, further elaborated on surviving the slammer to me: "If I were to pay attention [to what the press said], I wouldn't be here right now. I'd be somewhere with a needle up my arm, trying to ignore existence. Getting attacked by people constantly dissing you and telling you that this is awful about you and that's awful about you...It starts to wear and tear."

•  Pare-poo, you know I adore you, despite your hideously racist potty mouth (just remove the racist part, apologize already, and everything'll be perf!), which is why I'm going to do my bitchy best to getcha to heed—at least a modicum's worth—Michelle's sage words. Regroup and go your own way, not your mother's, and certainly not ours.

• And, as we began with Tyra, let's end with her, 'kay? Talked with more folks who are being affected by the big-bummed broad's sudden decision (reportedly due to a new romance for the fairly fickle girl) to move her gabfest and America's Next Top Model to InWhySee. Ain't pretty, so be prepared: "It was a knee-jerk decision that has put hundreds of Californians out of work," complained one Tyra worker bee who is opting to remain on the West Coast. Added the stirred-up show's insider: "Vendors geared up for another two big years, adding limos to fleets; people on the crew bought homes—and all this is with a whopping four weeks' notice?" Suffice it to say, Banks' campers ain't feelin' 'bout the babe like they do about Oprah, that's fer sure.  

Rosie O'Donnell, hostin' the RBKids Hard Hat Party Monday night in InWhySee. The Maravel Arts Center on West 45th Street. Charitable Ro is in the process of opening a building in said city for Rosie's Broadway Kids, which offers acting, singing and dancing lessons to underprivileged or abused tykes. How very Oprah-eqsue of her! The former View cohost was strictly biz, talking only about the evening's project, with no mention of the show. An audience member who dared introduce herself reports that Rosie, in a white linen blouse, black pants and yellow friggin' Crocs, seemed "like a really unhappy and angry person." Bet Elisabeth Hasselbeck would agree with that! Maybe Rosie's just pissed that she's not replacing...

Bob Barker, spotted celebrating his departure from The Price Is Right Saturday night. The genial host dined at Antonio's Mexican restaurant on Melrose. The dapper dinosaur was nicely dressed in slacks and a jacket, and he received a lovely round of applause from patrons when he arrived. Bobby-boy joined a table in the private room in the back and was "very tall in person and in great shape." Wonder what his secret is? Same as yours, Harrison Ford? (Or mine, for that matter?) Enjoying some grub 'n' girl talk back East were...

Carla Gugino and Connie Britton, lunchin' at Pastis Sunday afternoon. Both babes were dressed casual with little makeup and looked beautiful, nonetheless. Seems Carla-hon's had a change of coiffure since her stint on Entourage as Vince's (Adrian Grenier) agent, 'cause my fellow forker reports the hon's hair is now "very blond and chin length." But...is she having more fun? Having a low-key blast with his family was...

Mark Ruffalo, outside Mulberry Street Pizzeria in the Hills of Bev. Mark was hand-in-hand with his wife-unit, Sunrise Coigney, and kids while the domestic unit (so damn rare in Hell-Ay) perambulated down Cañon Drive. "They were adorable...just enjoying the sunny day," reports Desk Extra Cheese. Too cute!