Snooki Not as Annoying as You Thought, Just a "Lindsay Lohan Wannabe"

Jersey Shore star admits to being a public nuisance; criminal charges are dropped in exchange for $500 fine and two days of community service

You go before a judge, you'd better be ready for some judgment.

That's what happened to Jersey Shore's Snooki at her minutes-long hearing today on a trio of charges from her drunken Seaside Heights bust.

While she got off relatively easy, sentence-wise, she certainly had her you-know-what handed to her while she stood before the judge. Ready for an earful? 'Cause Snooki sure wasn't…

"You seem to be acting like a Lindsay Lohan wannabe," Judge Damian Murray chastised the demurely all-black-clad reality starlet. "Going through life rude, profane, obnoxious and self-indulgent is not the way you want to go through life."

(Wait a minute…Marsha Revel, is that you?)

The judge didn't stop there, though, and went on to question whether Nicole Polizzi's behavior on July 30 was truly her own misbehavior, or whether she was simply a puppet of the producers, asking her whether the arrest was "scripted or actions of your own initiative."

"If it was scripted, only you can determine whether it was worth trading your dignity for a paycheck."

Well, well, well, could someone be gunning for a reality show of their own?

As it is, the 22-year-old's hearing started roughly 85 minutes late (surprised?), and her attorney quickly admitted her wrongdoing for interfering with the public's quiet enjoyment of the beach (for real, it's an ordinance), saying she "used some loud language" and agreeing that "she interfered with the public's right to quiet enjoyment of the beach on this particular day."

However, he also said—with a straight face no less—that the incident marked nothing more than "a bad day" for the Snookster, and was "an anomaly in an otherwise well-lived life."

We'll wait while you regain your composure.

The criminal charges were dropped, as was the municipal ordinance of her being annoying, and Snooki spoke only to offer up an apology prior to her sentencing.

"I would definitely like to apologize to the Seaside cops, when I saw what happened and everyone told me what happened, I was very embarrassed," she said. "This was not like me and I've never been in this situation before."

Snooki was ordered to pay a fine of $500, and was sentenced to two days of community service with local animal control. She was given credit for one day already completed, after volunteering at Jersey's Popcorn Park Zoo animal refuge over the weekend.

"Ah never again!" Snooki tweeted moments after she silently left court. "So scary...thank you judge for understanding, I'm very thankful for that! Whew...now I can breath!"

And return to her regularly scheduled shenanigans.