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Evil Spoiler! Who's Really Dying on Desperate Housewives?

Deathly spoiler details from increasingly bizarre Wisteria Lane happenings

By Ted Casablanca Nov 11, 2009 9:28 PMTags
Eva Longoria Parker, Felicity Huffman, Marcia Cross, Dana DelanyJason Merritt/Getty Images

As our darling (and far less nefarious) colleague Kristin Dos Santos has spilled along with us, it's getting deadly over on Desperate Housewives' soapy Wisteria Lane. And now we know some of who, exactly, is getting offed.

This is all, of course, for the big finale this season, you know. Something to keep you sipping copious amounts of eggnog throughout the holidays while you wait to see just how all the fortysomething babes cope with the tragic occurrences caused by a plane crash right in front of their pretty picket fences.

Are you ready? BIGASS SPOILER ALERT, 'cause it sure ain't pretty. And it sure ain't who you'd suspect:

According to some of our stealthiest Housewives spies, including the ones who originally tipped us off to our scoop that Nicollette Sheridan was getting the ax, it's Lynette (Felicity Huffman) who will suffer this horrible circumstance the most. And no, we don't mean she's going to die, but someone terribly, terribly close to her.

One of her children.

How ghastly is that? See, Mrs. Scavo is preggers. And here's what I'm told is currently the plan:

"[Lynette] is pregnant with twins; she loses one of them—they could save it—but it would be deformed or something. So, she loses one of the twins, that's what happens."

Jeez, couldn't they just have chosen to do Susan in and called it day? Why punish these poor unborn souls instead? They haven't done anything to hurt anybody!

Give me adult back-stabbing and man-stealing machinations over this sad stuff any day. After all, it's what the show does best, both on camera and off!

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For more scoop on your fave TV shows head over to Watch With Kristin.