Review: A Perfect Getaway a Long Slog to Nowhere

Milla Jovovich, Steve Zahn and Timothy Olyphant spend much of this so-called thriller hiking and talking and hiking and talking and hiking and talking

Review in a Hurry: Milla Jovovich and Steve Zahn play newlyweds who go hiking in Hawaii. And they hike. And hike some more. For over an hour. There's also some stuff about a pair of murderers hiding out on the same island, but it doesn't pay off until the very end, by which time you may have hiked your way to the ticket counter to demand a refund.

The Bigger Picture: Every once in a while, a movie comes along that seems to have been made merely so those involved in the production could have an awesome vacation. Most of Brett Ratner's films, for example. But David Twohy, director of Pitch Black, we expect better from you. And do we have to sit through the result?

Along their interminable hike, Jovovich and Zahn encounter white-trash couple Chris Hemsworth (who sports a "do not revive" tattoo over his heart) and Marley Shelton, who scare them a little bit. Later, they run into another couple, played by Kiele Sanchez and Timothy Olyphant, who seem nice and normal until Olyphant reveals the metal plate in his head, and his skill at field-dressing a wild goat.

But wait! The murderers loose on the island have been reported to be a man and a woman! So one of these couples could be the fugitives! But since the guilty parties don't actually do anything scary until, like, the last fifteen minutes, this easily could have been a short. It might have even been a pretty good one, especially if Twohy had the time to sit down and reconsider his inexplicable decision to shoot a lengthy flashback reveal in black-and-white footage tinted blue.

Also irritating is the Kevin Williamson-like fashion in which the characters within the movie talk about movies—Zahn's character, alas, is a screenwriter. So just in case the reader doesn't get what is happening (not that there's much to get), we get lengthy conversations about red herrings and plot structure.

Let's cut to the chase, though: Some of you will undoubtedly be attracted by the idea of former Return to the Blue Lagoon star Jovovich doing another movie set at the beach. So to clarify: She's pretty much just in hiking gear throughout, except for a split-second swimming scene.

The 180—a Second Opinion: As a film-school exercise in the concept of reversal, there's a key scene here that might be worth studying, as much for what it fails to achieve as for what it does.