Five days before Robert Michael O'Ryan was arrested for trying to break into CBS studios and woo 17-year-old gymnast Shawn Johnson with "a loaded .45 handgun, a loaded shotgun and materials classically used for kidnapping, including duct tape, zip ties [and] a map to the victim," he had to get from Florida to California.
It was on this perilous trek that Alabama police tried to stand in his way over a mundane traffic violation. But he wasn't about to give up so easily and offered up this moving tale of devotion:
"I know it sounds a little bit crazy, but my, uh, my intuition tells me that, uh, we’re gonna have a beautiful relationship together," he explained, continuing with, "I’ve been communicating with her. And, uh. Basically, I’m gonna try to get her to marry me."
Had he told the officers that getting the Dancing With the Stars contestant to marry him involved two loaded guns and duct tape, perhaps they would have given him more than two traffic tickets—one for no insurance and the other for an expired license plate.
And yes, there is video of O'Ryan trying to explain who Shawn Johnson is to these officers who somehow missed the Olympics, DWTS and that one episode of The Secret Life of the American Teenager.
O'Ryan was eventually arrested successfully on March 24 and charged with felony stalking and two misdemeanor counts of carrying a loaded firearm in a vehicle.