What do you expect from the intro to a local nightly news program? Usually just the names of the reporters and some bad "news" style music, right? Not if we're talking about News Update on TV 6 circa 1980. To say this intro is the most epically newsmazing news intro ever would be an understatement. It is the news intro equivalent to drinking four 5 Hour Energy shots then running through a plate glass window directly onto a news set, sitting down behind the desk all bloody from the window but still psyched to the max on 5 Hour Energy then screaming, "NEWS," at the top of your lungs. Also there's a computer in the room doing high tech stuff. That's what this promo is.

By the way, that couple at the end spontaneously conceived and gave birth to the kid sitting in between them during the intro. It's that potent.

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