Since most of these telenovela stars have at some point dealt with the news that their mean adoptive parents were, in fact, alive, we assumed they'd be able to swallow a tiny dose of entertainment news. But what we found was that, in order to develop an immunity to these omg-esque stories, their plasma must be sucked and fed to you intravenously from one of the countless televisions plastered in the hallways of E!. Hopefully they'll all bounce back from this earth-shattering news with respective bouts of plot-driving, cureable amnesia.
success!