Robert Pattinson didn't invent the smokin' hot vampire. Or the angst-ridden supernatural love story, either. Undead hunk Angel—and his dear mortal Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar)—had that whole forbidden love thing perfected, like, years ago.
While bloodsucking brother brother Stefan (Paul Wesley) may make us swoon, we've always had a thing for the bad boys. Which is why we prefer Damon, who makes the whole undead thing far less brooding and more entertaining. Not to mention seriously, seriously sexy.
So the remake of the campy '60s soap opera might have been a bit overdone, boring and otherwise underwhelming, but the perennial teaming of Depp and director Tim Burton is enough to earn Barnabas Collins a place in our hearts. He does have an envy-inducing wardrobe, after all.
Now this remake actually worked. And who wouldn't be seduced by a hot, mysterious neighbor (who just so happens to be a serial killer of the undead variety) if he shared the same face as Farrell? Start planning our funerals now, because we're down to be eaten.
While the remake (titled simply Let Me In) is pretty good as far as Americanized remakes go and Chloë Grace Moretz certainly delivered on the whole child-vamp thing, Lina's Eli is the original gangster of creepiness. And goes much further than her U.S. counterpart can.
Eric Northman's more than just another Viking with his own Louisiana nightclub. He's 1,000 years old, rich and his blood will give you crazy sex dreams. Also, he tends to save the day a decent amount. And, he can fly! Beat that, other vampires who don't wear tracksuits.
Lestat's pad is without a doubt one of the hottest spots in Hollywood's batcave. Hey, remember that part when he wrapped his mouth around that cold, scaly, reptilian creature so he could stay alive—oh, no, wait, that was Eyes Wide Shut. Whoops!
He's adorable as a chaste teenager hunted by an undead countess thirsty for virgin blood. It raises a puzzling question, though: What's more rare in the L.A. dating scene—a vampire or a virgin? Also, this might just be the worst movie ever made about Los Angeles.
So many wistful afternoons are spent dreaming of Pitt's Louis from this flick—so where did he go? Really, Brad, get over the "serious actor" trip, grab some extensions and fangs, and get out of the coffin and into my car!
The (figuratively) soulless literary agent gets a hickey from a mysterious woman and is convinced he's a vampire. Cue a caped Cage running down the street screaming "I'm a vampire!" Some might say eating a real-life roach for a movie isn't hot, but those people are wrong.
He's deadlier than Dracula—he's Blacula. The ladies say his bite was outta sight! You get the picture, right?
While Skarsgård may arguably be the hotter of the two bloodsuckers, Pam is the HBIC of Bon Temps. And if you don't love her for her bile-spitting one-liners (usually directed at Sookie and her "precious fairy vagina"), then, let's be real: It's for her bitchin' love story with fellow feisty vamp, Tara.
She's one juicy piece of dead! Armed with clingy tops, tight pleather and plenty of guns, this vampire warrior defends her cadre of hemophiles against their sworn unkempt enemies: werewolves. Who are, let's be clear, not hot.
As an uncredited stripper/vampire queen in the Quentin Tarantino-Robert Rodriguez flick, she only has one scene. Where she grinds a python. In a bikini. On George Clooney's table. You're welcome.
Proof that the undead can still rock! Sutherland and his glam gang of pasty pals sleep all day, party all night, and toss hilariously camp lines like "You'll never grow old and you'll never die. But you must feeeeeed!"
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