Leave it to Gwyneth Paltrow and her Goop website to dive into bed with you...
The actress has dedicated an entire issue of her lifestyle blog to helping improve your sex life. But before you go running off like you did when she told you to steam your vagina, fret not! This newsletter is not only helpful, it's also educational on many different levels that go beyond what happens between the sheets.
However, as is always the case with Goop, there are some pretty outrageous suggestions, too (including a $3,000 "c-ring"). So with that being said, here are the top 9 best sex tips Gwynnie and her team provided:
1. Sex Toys are Fun, Accessible and Even Work With Your Smart Phone
Goop suggests tons of sex toys for every type of person, from the "glamour puss" to the "mistress-in-training." While the prices vary along a wide range, we couldn't help but pick out a few of the pricier ones (because, Goop), including: a $673 tickler ring, a $1,500 cuff-and-chain and a $3,128.70 solid silver cock ring.
2. There's an App For That (and by That, We Mean Lessons on Sexual Pleasure)
Social psychologist Justin Lehmiller suggests looking into "websites and apps (such as OMGYes), designed to teach men and women more about female sexual anatomy and pleasure," a topic he believes is "sorely lacking in American sex education."
3. You Should Only Have "Casual Sex" if You Really Want to
Lehmiller says, "If you have casual sex because it's something that you really want to do and it's consistent with your values, if you think casual sex is fun, if it's an experience you think is important to have, or if you simply want to explore your sexuality, chances are that you'll be happy you did it."
However, on the other end, you shouldn't be having it for ulterior motives. He continued, "If you're having casual sex because you want to feel better about yourself, you're hoping it will turn into an LTR, or you want to get back at someone or make an ex jealous, there's a good chance you'll end up wishing you hadn't done it."
4. Take This Into Consideration When Questioning "Casual Sex"
"One of the most important traits to consider here is your sociosexual orientation—the ease with which you separate sex from emotion," Lehmiller explained. "In other words, are you comfortable with the idea of sex without love, or do you think the two need to go together?"
5. Watching Porn With Your Partner Can Better Your Sex Life
"Couples who watch porn together tend to have healthier sexual relationships," says AASECT certified sex therapist and supervisor Dr. David Ley. "It's really only when porn is watched in secret that it predicts negative relationship outcomes."
6. Anal Sex Takes Practice
It's become a popular phenomenon, but not a lot of people are actually doing it. If you feel like experimenting, research psychoanalyst Paul Joannides, Psy.D. (the author of the comprehensive book on sexuality, The Guide to Getting it On!), explains, "One of the first things a woman or man needs to do if they want to be on the receiving end of anal sex is to teach their sphincter muscles to relax enough that a penis can get past their gates. This takes a lot of practice."
7. Anal Also Takes Physical and Emotional Preparation
Joannides suggests spending "a few weeks helping the receiving partner train her anal sphincters to relax. Make sure you and your partner have great sexual communication, trust, and that you both want to do it, as opposed to one trying."
He also says that during the actual experience, it's important to "get the angle right," "use lots of lube," and wear protection (obviously).
8. Stand in Front of a Mirror Naked and Write Down Everything You Love About Yourself
This piece of advice is suggested by Girls & Sex author Peggy Orenstein who says it can help you appreciate what a "miracle" you're body is and give you a "stronger hold on the keys to your own sexual well-being."
9. Women Need to Enjoy Sex More
Orenstein says sex can often be a one-sided thing with women feeling the pressure to pleasure men, rather than both people experiencing joy. She believes this needs to change in order for women to achieve "orgasm equality" during intercourse.
Thus, she suggests "getting back in our bodies, appreciating what they give us, feeling entitled not just to engage in a sexual experience, but to enjoy it. And truly? I think most men would be down for that as well."