by Seija Rankin | Tue., Feb. 16, 2016 1:28 PM
By this point, it's very well known what Kanye West thinks of his new album The Life of Pablo.
Among a few key reviews from Mr. West himself are compliments like "The album of the life" and "one of the greatest albums."
And there's one listener, Taylor Swift, who has a bit of a different opinion. We won't insert ourselves into a half-feud that doesn't involve us at all, but let's just say she's not quite as fond of the album as Yeezy.
Of course, when it comes to music reviews, it's worth taking some cues from the professionals. You know, like critics? Now that the full version of T.L.O.P. has been out in the world for a few days, the reviews are rolling in. Some are glowing, some are searing, but they're all extremely entertaining. Ahead are the best lines from the critics—we would tell 'Ye to close his eyes for this part, but we know he's gonna do him regardless. And isn't that what we all love?
On whether Kanye had new-parent brain: "Everything about the album's presentation—the churning tracklist, the broken promises to premiere it here or there, the scribbled guest list—feels like Kanye ran across town to deliver a half-wrapped gift to a group birthday party to which he was 10 minutes late." — Pitchfork
On the Taylor Swift reference heard 'round the world: "But that line is a feature, not a bug: It's funny, outrageous, provocative, clickable, insecure, and even a touch corny. In other words, it's everything we've come to expect from Kanye, a man renowned for reveling in his DGAFness." — Entertainment Weekly
On the real reason we're buzzing about it: "The Life of Pablo is the first album made for Twitter Moments, a plot point on a grotesque reality show." — Complex
On the album's possible namesake: "Pablo Picasso and Kanye West share many qualities—impatience with formal schooling, insatiable and complicated sexual appetites, a vampiric fascination with beautiful women as muses—but Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole." — Pitchfork
On the darkness of the track "Freestyle 4": "Imagine a druggy, hellish videogame level where the big boss is your own reflection in a broken mirror" — Entertainment Weekly
On why the reviewer, well, really didn't like the album: "This is #SMH (shake my head) time in Kanye land, and now there's an ungainly 18-track, 58-minute album that may take months to fully decode. In a world that was ruled by hyper-speed hot takes of, well, everything, "The Life of Pablo" presents a particular challenge: Scattershot, dense, bewildering, frustrating, off-putting, impenetrable, and filled with throwaways." — Chicago Tribune
On adorable British disses: "Feedback features West finally doing what the rest of the world has been doing for the last few years and wondering aloud whether he's actually gone round the twist." — The Guardian
On all the name-changes: "Was this album worth it all? I'd say so — really wish he just called it So Help Me God, though." — Spin
On why ego might be a good thing: "West's shamelessness is one of his great gifts: it's the quality that allowed him to make "Runaway," to blaspheme by naming himself Yeezus, and to spend an afternoon passing around the aux cord at Madison Square Garden." — The Verge
On the psychology of it all: "He wants the world to see him as an asshole because he gets terrified that the world might see him as a restless husband ("FML"), a guilt-ridden son ("Wolves"), a manipulative phony ("Real Friends"), a distant dad ("Father Stretch My Hands, Pt. 2") and all the other things he worries he is." — Rolling Stone
On the Bible: "...unless you count the moment on Wolves where he appears to compare Kim Kardashian to the Virgin Mary, the similarities between his wife and the mother of Jesus having curiously escaped everyone else." — The Guardian
On stamina: "It's been five-plus years since Kanye first asked us to raise a toast to the douchebags, my arm is getting tired." — Spin
On the New York Times' last word: "Now his rapping is sparser, more pointed, less imagistic and more emotional. And when he truly needs to be heard, he can corral a dream team of collaborators. He's so fluent that he can use others to speak for him, and be understood clear as day."
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