As the esteemed model of Vogue's February cover, Derek Zoolander has invited a camera crew into his apartment for an exclusive walk-through of his international supermodel lifestyle.
It's been 15 years since the runway regular was last in the American spotlight, but the esteemed trendsetter doesn't look like he's aged a day. Chock it up to tip-top genes, but Zoolander isn't taking a chance on fate to stay really, really good-looking.
Instead, he has created a Manhattan sanctuary designed to preserve his iconic look. Bonus—he is finally inviting fans inside for an in-depth look.
To start, location is key for the cover star. You won't ever find him in Brooklyn—he really hopes "they find a cure" for the location. Instead, he enjoys the Big Apple for it's diversity. "You have really good-looking people and also very attractive people."
In maintaining his slim physique, he avoids the subway. "Sandwiches are a gateway to cake."
As an alternative, he gets his weight reps in at his clothing racks, pushing the hanging items back and forth as he browses.
While Zoolander insists the hardest part about being a model is all the chafing, he avoids the daily discomfort of sweating during his intense workouts by having his sweat glands completely removed. "Any sweating you see me do is through a surrogate."
Don't count on Zoolander to spend too much time in the kitchen, either. His least favorite foods are "solids." He sticks to a strict diet of water with lemon to drink, water with lime to eat and—if he wants to splurge—he'll grab a water with a cucumber slice. His fridge is stocked with water bottles and bags of raw carrots, but if he's having a particularly stressful day, he'll turn to a kale colonic to "decompress."
Finally, his beauty routine is equally intricate and pricey, as expected. He revealed he already has a packed schedule for tomorrow because he has to get his eyebrows lifted, his ears pinned and his belly button removed. Though, in between lifts, he has taken to "knitting" his brows as a hobby.
Unfortunately, even an adonis like Zoolander can't achieve his own version of perfection despite such dedication. He admitted that he cried watching 12 Years of Slave because he was envious of one of the A-list actors.
"Brad Pitt's highlights were just so perfect."