Alexis Bledel, Lauren Graham, Gilmore Girls

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Gilmore Girls has left a lasting legacy—so lasting, in fact, that it's getting a second revival on Netflix. Among the many influences it's had on our culture (like an endless supply of witty banter and a renewed appreciation for small-town traditions), perhaps the most telling is its perspective on family.

Rory and Lorelai Gilmore are certainly not the typical American family, what with the small age gap between them and all, but that was precisely why people connected to them so strongly. No offenses to the Home Improvements of television, but there was something so refreshing about watching a show about two extremely well-intentioned people trying (and struggling at times) to make it work.

Of course, any article about the mother-daughter relationship on Gilmore Girls would be remiss to mention the haters. Among all the Sherman-Palladino devotees who began wearing berets and watching old movies and speaking in cadences only meant for those without a need for oxygen, there was a sizable group who believed that the Gilmores were akin to relationship detriment.

For starters, there's the co-dependence. And then there's the unrealistic expectation of closeness. If we're speaking seriously, almost no one has a symbiotic BFF scenario with their own mother, and watching the show could set you up for some serious disappointment. 

But regardless of your opinion on mothers-as-friends or constant banter, there's a lot to learn from these two women, of both the "do" and "don't" variety—whether you're looking to add a level of Gilmore-y closeness to your own relationship with your mother or just trying to be the most Lorelai mom you can to your future daughter.

Keep your own baggage out of it.
Not everything from Gilmore Girls is worth emulating, most notably Lorelai's ability to weigh Rory down with her own mommy issues. Everyone's got 'em—without the concept of pain from your childhood, we wouldn't even have a show like Gilmore Girls. But that doesn't mean it's worth passing down to the next generation. Lorelai certainly has reason to be weird about her parents; being raised by wealthy society mavens, having a baby at 16 and then running away from home to live in a shed behind an inn will do that to you.

And sure, she's probably a little correct in her suspicion that Emily and Richard see Rory as the daughter they wished they had, but that's something she should keep between herself and her nightly glass of wine. After all, projecting your own grudges onto your daughter can have disastrous results—it could have kept Rory from going to Yale, for Pete's sake. Whatever any of our complaints are about our own parents, we owe them the opportunity to right their wrongs with the next generation. Or at least wait until our future daughters discover their grandparents' character flaws for themselves.

Always play on the same team.
This is a rule that goes both ways. One of the most inspiring and heartwarming aspects of Rory and Lorelai's relationship is that they have each other's backs no matter what, whether they're taking down the administrators of Chilton or deviled egg-ing Jess' car. It's often far too easy to see your mother as the enemy who only wants to control you or judge you (and it's even easier when she's lecturing you for yet another life choice she disapproves of), but the Gilmores to implore all of us to remember that life is a team sport. It's important to find your own path, but full rebellion against your upbringing doesn't get you very far (just ask Lorelai how that's going with Emily).

On the other side, Rory is a fabulous example of what it looks like to truly be on your mother's side. She (almost) never expects Lorelai to be anything but human, with her own struggles to deal with. This is where a cheesier person would insert that whole walk-a-mile-in-their-shoes thing. 

Banter is life.
Okay, so most of us aren't lucky enough to have a genius like Amy Sherman-Palladino scripting our every word—or a circle of friends who all have the exact same cadence and comedic timing, for that matter. But there's still a lesson here, and it's that a sense of humor can be magic to a mother-daughter relationship. Self-deprecating humor is always gold, and you should never, ever be afraid to make fun of your mother. 

After all, who would Rory and Lorelai be if they didn't play practical jokes on each other or were too shy to call each other out for the horrible fashion choices? Dead inside, that's what. 

Never miss an opportunity for advice.
Taking your parents for granted is a tale as old as time. Generation after generation has failed to appreciate the sacrifices that were made to provide the life you enjoy, and that's not going to change anytime soon. But what you can start to do is remember what a wealth of knowledge you both are for each other. Your mother was your age once, and there's a good chance she's endured exactly what you have—and she's come out the other side, natch. 

Rory and Lorelai's daily life is an encyclopedia of advice at every turn, and they're a great reminder that lessons can come when you least expect them. Lorelai's friend-first-mom-second mantra may not work for everybody, but she manages to be helpful in a decidedly un-preachy way. And their sister-esque demeanor gives Rory the opportunity to pass on a few pearls of wisdom herself, like when Lorelai is faced with one of her many guy problems. We could all take a page from her book.

Tune into E! News at 7 p.m. and 11 p.m. for more on Gilmore Girlsincluding some incredible first interviews with the cast!

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