Grey Book Cover

Penguin Random House UK

Today is a monumental day in our nation's literary history. Grey, the much-dreadedanticipated follow-up to the Fifty Shades of Grey series, is officially available to the public. 

The reading masses have been clamoring to get their hands on a copy of the novel, which tells the story of Christian and Ana's courtship from Christian's perspective, but not quite for the reason that you might think. It's plausible that some legitimate fans of E.L. James exist, but it seems that most people simply want to give the novel a good long hate-read. And hate-read they did.

Horrified victims readers everywhere were so disturbed by the content (or, more accurately, the writing) of Grey that they felt compelled to share their ordeals with the world. Complaints and sarcastic comments touched on everything from the over-the-top sex scenes (garlic butt plugs, really?) to James' seeming obsessions with describing breakfast goods in unnecessary detail. 

One might wonder whether these readers should have known what they were getting into, but most people will just be glad for the entertainment. And it saves the rest of us from having to read the book ourselves. One scroll through Twitter and we've got all the conversation starters we could ever need. 

Of course, before you read on, we should warn you that some of these excerpts are a tad bit NSFW. But that's why we're all here, isn't it?

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