Amy Schumer: I Don't Have Time for Sex

Funny lady also talks about hosting the upcoming MTV Movie Awards

By Marc Malkin Apr 07, 2015 2:36 PMTags
Amy Schumer, Night of Too Many StarsComedy Central

Amy Schumer is one of the hottest women in Hollywood right now.

She has her own sketch show on Comedy Central. She wrote and stars in the upcoming Trainwreck, a raunchy (but heartfelt) comedy that earned rave reviews at South by Southwest last month and, on Sunday, she'll make her debut as host of the MTV Movie Awards.

Even so, she's not getting any action!

"I've got nothing," Schumer told me at SXSW. "I don't even have any prospects. You always hear actresses says, 'I've got my dog and I like to bake.' I don't even have a dog and I don't like to bake so I seriously got nothing. I'm so busy I don't even know when I'd fit in somebody having sex with me right now."

Universal Pictures

In Trainwreck, she plays a magazine writer who doesn't believe in monogamy but is thrown for a loop when she actually starts falling for a good guy, a sports medicine doctor played by Bill Hader.

Her character is a boozer who smokes a lot of pot.

Even though Schumer wrote the film and her character's name is Amy, she insists she is nothing like her movie alter-ego.

"I've only had one one-night stand in my life and it was great," she said, adding, "The sort of revolving door of dudes is not really my life…I do love drinking and going out but I'm also an introvert."

She insists she won't terrorize too many of the celebs in attendance at the MTV Movie Awards. "I'm not like, 'Look out, nobody's safe!'" Schumer said. "It's not like that all. I like to make fun of myself."

Universal Pictures

So who is she excited about seeing at the show?

"Everybody!" Schumer said. "People like Miles Teller and what's name—Angle Elgort or is it Ansel Adams?

"I love looking at beautiful children," she said. "I love Twilight. I just want to look at beautiful children. I just want to watch beautiful kids stare at each other. I'm not even joking. I don't even acknowledge that there's another section at bookstores other than young adult."

Sounds like the perfect MTV Movie Awards host to us.

The MTV Movie Awards air Sunday, April 12 at 8 p.m.