Praise Tatum! The trailer for future Oscar-, Emmy-, BAFTA-, SAG-, Grammy-, Kids Choice Award- and Golden Globe-winning film Magic Mike XXL has dropped.
Also dropping? Panties.
Here are all the moments when Channing Tatum & Co. made people curse the sky because the thrusting, grinding and ab-flexing was Just. Too. Much.
Teaser, indeed.
1. When the audience asks Channing Tatum: "Are we adequately prepared for all the pure, raw sexuality that's about to slap us in the face during this trailer?" And he answered:
2. When Channing taught us that thrusting to the beat of a Ginuwine song is how you yield the best welding results:
3. When he relented because the beat eventually did get him (damn you, Gloria Estefan!) and he started limbering up by rubbing his legs:
4. When he came to life, and thus, he gave us life:
5. This whole sweaty, glistening sequence, which is basically the Kevin Bacon Footloose barn dance for our generation:
6. Channing's cocky, smug look before all hell (and pelvises) break loose:
7. When Joe Manganiello probably broke a couple of laws in this gas station, but he did it in the name of art:
8. When you became enraged with jealousy because of whatever is happening to these girls here:
9. When you started counting the abs on this stage and lost count at 42:
10. When Taterz had the sassiest exit ever:
11. When you thought the trailer had finally shown mercy on you by ending, and then you got a couple more frames of crotch before it reminded you that this whole delicious spectacle wouldn't be out for months:
Smoke 'em if you got 'em.*
*Don't smoke. It's bad for you.