Dean McDermott

E! Entertainment

Dean McDermott won't be defined by his downfall.

As his wife Tori Spelling remains hospitalized, the Chopped Canada host is opening up about the state of his marriage and his public image problem following his two-day fling with Emily Goodhand in late 2013.

"When you're at the checkout and you look over and you see one of these magazines and it's like, 'Dean McDermott's a monster,' I'm like, 'No, I'm not a monster, I'm a human being and I messed up,'" says the father of five, 47, who is trying to maintain his sobriety and seeing a therapist with Spelling. "I messed up and I'm owning up to it and I'm getting help. But to label me a monster or evil is very hurtful."

When McDermott first started seeing Spelling in 2006, he was still married to Mary Jo Eustace. Spelling, meanwhile, was married to Charlie Shanian when she fell in love with her Mind Over Murder co-star. "You know, I'm not the first person to ever cheat on his wife," the actor says of his portrayal in the press.

Regarding his dalliance with Goodhand, McDermott tells ET Canada, "The affair was more about how I was feeling about myself than having an affair." As for Spelling's current health problems, he says, "The show we're shooting is obviously very emotional. It's six days a week. It finally caught up with her and took its toll, so she has bronchitis, sinusitis and pneumonia and she's getting great care at the hospital."

"Everything is OK," the True Tori star reiterates. "All the tabloids are reading Ebola and it's not."

On Thursday, however, Spelling, 41, Instagrammed a sad selfie that implied otherwise. "This sick in hospital I finally see how quickly life can take it all away frm you," she wrote. "We all need 2 step up frm inside& go 4 it! W/our friends by our side. Sadly I've finally faced truth that 1 person will never be there 4 me #TrueTori."

Spelling did not identify who that "1 person" is.

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