Ron Galella/WireImageRobin Williams was always extremely candid about his past struggles with addiction and depression, but his shocking death on Monday gives insight into how his personal demons continued over the course of his illustrious career.
In the last few decades, the Oscar winner has spoken up in interviews about his sobriety, falling off the wagon and how his addictions have led to the demise of at least one of his marriages.
In 1988, the actor told People magazine, "Cocaine for me was a place to hide. Most people get hyper on coke. It slowed me down."
He admitted that he quit both cocaine and alcohol cold turkey in 1982 when his first wife was pregnant with their son, Zak.
Williams added, "There was the baby coming. I knew I couldn't be a father and live that sort of life."
Williams remained sober for nearly 20 years, and in 2006 he checked himself into a treatment center for alcohol addiction.
Two months after checking himself into rehab, he opened up to Diane Sawyer about his long battle and said that falling off the wagon was "very gradual."
"It's the same voice thought that…you're standing at a precipice and you look down, there's a voice and it's a little quiet voice that goes, 'Jump,'" Williams said on Good Morning America.
"The same voice that goes, 'Just one.' The idea of just one for someone who has no tolerance for it, that's not the possibility."
And in 2009, he told the New York Times that treating the underlying issues of his addiction was one of the hardest hurdles he faced.
"There was still, in the background, this voice, like, 'Psst,'" the Good Will Hunting star explained. "So when I relapsed, I went back hard. The one thing I hadn't dealt with was, how honest do you want to live?"
In a 2010 interview with The Mirror, Williams continued to open up about his alcohol abuse, saying, "It's literally just being afraid. And you think, oh, [the alcohol] will ease the fear. And it doesn't…For that first week you lie to yourself, and you tell yourself you can stop, and then your body kicks back and says, no, stop later. And then it took about three years, and you finally do stop."
He also discussed going through one of the darkest times in his life in an interview on WTF With Marc Manon:
"When I was drinking, there was only one time, where even for a moment, I thought: ‘F--k life.' But then even my conscience brain went, did you really just say f--k life? You know you have a pretty good life as it is right now. Have you noticed the two houses? Yes. Have you noticed the girlfriend? Yes. Have you noticed that things are pretty good, even though you may not be working right now? Yes."
Just last year, Williams recalled the very moment that he began to drink again when speaking to Parade.
"One day, I walked into a store and saw a little bottle of Jack Daniel's. And then that voice—I call it the lower power—goes, 'Hey. Just a taste. Just one.' I drank it, and there was that brief moment of ‘Oh, I'm okay!' But it escalated so quickly. Within a week I was buying so many bottles I sounded like a wind chime walking down the street. I knew it was really bad one Thanksgiving when I was so drunk they had to take me upstairs."
The Grammy winner most recently checked into a treatment center to maintain his sobriety.
At the time, his rep released the following statement: "After working back-to-back projects, Robin is simply taking the opportunity to fine-tune and focus on his continued commitment, of which he remains extremely proud."
And on Monday, his rep confirmed his untimely death and added, "He has been battling severe depression of late. This is a tragic and sudden loss. The family respectfully asks for their privacy as they grieve during this very difficult time."
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