You Need to Read the Best Letter Ever Written by a Kid at Summer Camp

An eight-year-old writes about lighting farts on fire, scarring his mom probably for life

By Jenna Mullins Jun 09, 2014 5:25 PMTags
Child Writing LetterGetty Images

When blogger Liesl Testwuide sent her eight-year-old son to summer camp, it was the first time he would be away from home for more than a night. And obviously she missed him dearly and couldn't wait to hear from him.

"As the days passed, I wrote to him daily. Each hour dragged as I'd wait for the mailman, hoping for just one letter from him," Liesl wrote on her blog. "By that point I missed him so much, I began to imagine what he might write."

Her imaginary letter from her son included tales of fireflies, making lifelong friends and learning about how to fish and tie sailing knots. What she actually got when her son finally wrote to her is just the best thing that's ever come out of summer camp: 

http://www.hairpinturnsahead.com/

"Dear Mom

Good you packt extra underwear since I had diyareeya. It got on my shoes but not my pillow. I'm having fun at camp and learning stuff. I rock at winserfing and kyaking. I've ate more push-pops then anyone. I've ate 23 since Monday. Still two days left…

http://www.hairpinturnsahead.com/

37 is the rekerd and I can beat it. Sweet! I went horseback riding and the horse in front of me took 3 huge dumps. Smoke came off the poop. It was awesome. I used my toothbrush to dig for werms. Don't freek out. The guy in the bottem bunk lets me use his. Its safe. I don't know his name but he can burp the alphabit like me. A kid named Zack can burp the alphabit backwords. I'm practising that. We put oatmeel in the counsillor's baseball hat. It was pretty funny. 

http://www.hairpinturnsahead.com/

Oatmeel is bad Mom. Even with razins. I shot a riffel. I'm a good aimer. Can we get one when I get home. Did you know you can light farts on fire? I'll show you on Satterday.

Love, W xoxo

PS your spaketti is way better

PSS Tell my brothers to have lots of farts for Satterday." 

We shall henceforth put "did you know you can lights fart on fire?" at the bottom of our emails. Who needs inspirational quotes when you can say that?!