Couple Kissing

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Happy Valentine's Day! We hope you have a Valentine today, even if your Valentine is yourself! And we hope that you get a little bow chica wow wow tonight...if you know what we mean.

(We hope you know what we mean, because absolutely nothing about that was subtle.)

Even if you have to get a little bow chica wow wow from yourself. And to help put the chica in your bow chica wow wow, Words With Friends and Zynga surveyed over 11,000 players of the Scrabble-like game to ask what the most awkward sexy words are.

To test the sexy to awkward ratio of these words, we have paired each with the sexiest GIF we could find online. From least to most awkward, here are the results. Do not use any of these in your dirty talk:

5. "Stroke" [verb. \ˈstrōk\ 1. to rub gently in one direction]

Sexy GIF

Verdict: Well, ya know, "stroke" isn't too bad. We wouldn't mind if The Notebook had featured a little more stroking...if you know what we mean. And again, we hope you do because not subtle. At all.

4. "Loins" [noun. \ˈlin\ 1. the area of a person's body that includes the sexual organs 2. the part of a human being or quadruped on each side of the spinal column between the hipbone and the false ribs]

Sexy GIF

Verdict: So very...technical. We wish we knew how to quit you, the word "loins."

2/3 (tie). "Throb" [verb. \ˈthräb\ 1. to pulsate or pound with abnormal force or rapidity]

Sexy GIF

Verdict: Well, Fitz once told Olivia that he "couldn't control his erection around her," which may not only be the most awkard thing ever said on TV, but the most awkward thing ever said by a human ever, fictional or not. In comparison, "throb" isn't that bad. But it's still not great.

2/3 (tie). "Aroused" [verb. \ə-ˈraz- ed\1. to rouse or stimulate]

Sexy GIF

Verdict: Almost seeing Zac Efron's butt does have us feeling a certain way, but we would not use that particular word to describe it. Because that would be awkward.

And the most awkward sex word is...

1. "Thrust" [verb. \ˈthrəst\ 1. to push or drive with force]

Sexy GIF

Verdict: Uh, yeah. Awkward. Not even James Franco could save this one.

If you're looking for more awkward Valentine's Day fun, check out Funny Or Die's cringe-worthy Cupid's Grotto segment, starring with Legit's Jim Jefferies. Try not to blush, it gets pretty NSFW:

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