Jennifer Lopez

Hey, if we were Jennifer Lopez we'd flaunt that fully-insured fanny too. But this time, her choice of cheek cover is a little confusing...

Are these the kind of bottoms a '50s dancer would don or are they more like under things an 80-year-old woman would wear? As far as we're concerned, the fact that we're even asking that question is reason enough to do a costume change.

Sure, the no-pants look highlights the "We Are One (Ole Ola)" singer's gorgeous gams, but is it worth what's got to be the world's worst wedgie?! From the looks of it, this triple threat can barely walk in her cream crotch creepers, let alone dance!

We're all for being slaves to sexy style, but this is bordering on fashion masochism. Hopefully J.Lo has an assistant on standby to zip her out of those mini torture chambers the minute she loses circulation to the legs!

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