Shark [shahrk]
noun
1. Something that will kill you.
Still, certain people keep trying to go and chill with sharks in the ocean. And bad stuff always happens. (People aren't even trying to chill with sharks and sharks are all up in their business anyway, so maybe let's just stay out of the water all together.)
Watch this video of Shaun Harrington, 27, attempting "extreme cage diving" off the coast of Australia using only a birdcage. Surprise! He is nearly attacked by a 10-foot tiger shark (a 10-foot tiger shark that he knew was in the water but didn't expect to "come at" him).
Shaun tells Australia's 9News the diving was "not the smartest thing" and that it "sort of went wrong for us." To which we must ask, what was the best-case outcome of this?
"I thought I would just jump in, get a couple of shots and hop out but the thing just went crazy," he recalls. "It wigged out and came at me." (In the video's description he is not as calm, saying, (I THOUGHT I WAS GOIN TO DIE!!!!!!!!! ")
"It's probably one of the dumbest things I've ever done," Shaun concludes.
Shaun is a member of The Mad Hueys, who are, as they explain:
...about getting up in the morning and looking out the window and saying "I'm the maddest Huey in this joint. No barney, no wave, no fish, no boat, no rod, no person, no party can stop us, cause we run with the deepest pack in the business and just in case you forgot what it was... it's The Mad F--king Hueys"
Yeah, we have no idea what any of that means, but here are a few headlines we found from doing one simple Google News search for "shark attack":
Surge in Shark Attacks Sets Hawaii Tourists, Residents on Edge
Western Australia's War on Sharks Won't Make Swimmers Any Safer
Great White Shark Doing Figure-8 off Brevard's Coast
Leonardo DiCaprio Survives Shark Attack After Getting Trapped in Diving Cage
And that took all of .2 seconds. So, stop going near sharks, people. Just stop it.