Happy Thanksgiving! Here's How Your Favorite TV Characters Would Handle Turkey Day Dinner

We imagine how the stars of Scandal, How I Met Your Mother, American Horror Story and more would cook their Thanksgiving dinners

By Leanne Aguilera Nov 26, 2013 10:34 PMTags
Thanksgiving TV, Parks and Rec, Scandal, Vampire Diaries, CovenNBC; ABC; CW; FX

Gobble, gobble, TV lovers!

Thanksgiving Day is almost here and in anticipation of all the amazing holiday specials that will be hitting the tube this weekend, we let our TV-obsessed minds run a little wild. Using our extensive (and at times frightening) knowledge of the small screen's most classic characters, we imagined what it would be like if you stumbled into the houses of your favorite TV folks this Thanksgiving.

From a bewitching house in New Orleans, to a 16th century castle and a post-apocalyptic prison, find out how your TV faves from Scandal, Parks and Rec and many more would handle the daunting task of Thanksgiving Dinner.  

1. Olivia Pope, Scandal: Olivia was too busy flawlessly handling 17 of the biggest problems in D.C. to cook Thanksgiving dinner. She would, however, pop open a bottle of her favorite red wine, call up the city's most prestigious catering company (they owe her a huge favor) and order a feast for her faithful gladiators. Olivia would enjoy a quiet evening alone with her popcorn as she debates whether or not she's going to be pissed at Fitz or madly in love with him next week.

2. Mellie Grant, Scandal: After posing for a photo op at their fake, one-big-happy-first-family Thanksgiving, Mellie would grab anything with alcohol and get hammered. She would then spend the rest of the evening wandering the halls of the West Wing and shamelessly flirting with that one secret service agent who clearly has a crush on her.

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3. Rick Grimes, The Walking Dead: Our scrappy little gang could have had a great, big ham this thanksgiving, but thanks to Rick's sad little piggy slaughter for the walkers, the group is now forced to be a bit more creative. Maggie would open the can of yams that they have been saving for five months, Hershel would risk his life to hobble outside the prison walls to gather berries for dessert and Daryl would successfully snag three squirrels for their feast. Carl wouldn't eat any food. He would just stare at the group with his moody, preteen-perfected glare.

4. Mary, Queen of Scots, Reign: Mary would kindly ask the kitchen staff to prepare the most elaborate and delicious feasts for all those in the castle. Too bad her happy dinner would be ruined by a poisoned pie—prematurely tasted by a handmaiden, and the fact that Olivia keeps making suggestive and wildly inappropriate gestures under the table to Francis. Oh, well. At least Bash would be looking handsome in the candlelight…

5. Fiona Goode, American Horror Story: Coven: A lady like Fiona wouldn't dare to ruin her dainty figure by gorging on a huge meal. She would smoke a couple cigarettes, do a couples lines and then sleep with a lucky handsome devil at a bar. Careful, Fiona. With your luck, he really could be the devil.

Richard Cartwright/FOX

6. Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother: Um, cooking is for chicks. And besides, Barney's apartment doesn't even have a real oven—it's made of cardboard. After giving himself a self-five just for being his year-round, awesome self, Barney and his fiancé would drink scotch, smoke cigars and be thankful for their amazing sex life. And then they would have sex.

7. Elena Gilbert, The Vampire Diaries: In an attempt to mend things between the Salvatore brothers and her fragile friendship with Caroline, Elena would do her best to cook Thanksgiving dinner for everyone who can still eat actual food. So, basically just Matt, Jeremy, Bonnie and a very reluctant Katherine. Unfortunately, learning how to cook was never high on her vampire to-do list. In the end, she would pass out blood bags and bourbon and compel a pizza delivery guy to give them everything in his truck. Bon appétit, bloodsuckers!

Colleen Hayes/NBC

8. Leslie Knope, Parks and Rec: Leslie worked tirelessly for three weeks to give her friends the best Thanksgiving dinner in the history of the world. We're serious. Each place-setting would be marked with a personally engraved mahogany box and inside is everyone's individual birthstone (she's been watching a lot of Friends lately). There would be 12 courses of perfectly delicious dishes, but Ron Swanson would receive a special bacon-wrapped 19-pound turkey to devour alone in the other room. Finally, there would be J.J.'s waffles for dessert.

9. Dr. Mindy Lahiri, The Mindy Project: She would set up a work Thanksgiving dinner at her place complete with yams (minus the marshmallows. She already ate them all), and cereal in wine glasses. Hey, don't judge. She's a doctor! She doesn't have 19 hours to prepare a whole meal. But all this would be a gigantic rouse to land the latest guy she has had her eye on. Her plan will fail, but at least Danny is there…