This week, big news hit the celebrity gossip world: Courtney Stodden andDoug Hutchison announced that they were splitting up.

Some people may have been shocked by this news. The Soup was not.

Of course, E!'s pop-culture-skewering comedy show wouldn't be surprised...after all, when it's your job to dig through the depths of reality television, celeb gossip and all things absurd in the entertainment world, few things surprise you at all anymore.

And so, in honor of this shockingly not-shocking news, The Soup brings you a special message from Doug and Courtney. Kind of.

The video is actually a short sketch with The Soup writers/performers Kelly Levy and Lee Farber, who take on the roles of Courtney and Doug for The Soup whenever duty calls.

In the sketch, Doug and Courtney explain their split, announcing that they're remaining friends...just not the type of friends who will "hit me up for cash or tickets to an R-rated movie."

Courtney also introduces us to her new beau, who meets her specific criteria in a husband...and Doug introduces us to his.

But can these two really stay away from each other?

Tune in tonight at 10/9c for an all-new episode of The Soup, followed by the season finale of The Soup Investigates, only on E!

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