Theo Wargo/Getty ImagesMelissa Gorga's book, Love Italian Style, has caused a fair bit of controversy.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey star makes the case that women want their men to be more aggressive in the bedroom, which has led some to claim she's promoting "marital rape." Melissa adamantly denied this in an interview with E! News, and on Monday, Sept. 30, she further explains on her Bravo blog "that there's a difference between racy and 'rapey.'"
She explains that husband Joe Gorga's quotes in the book saying "every woman wants to have her hair pulled and clothes ripped off sometimes" are "not meant to be read literally."
"When Joe and I talk about dominance and submission, it's racy. It's about a man being a man, a woman being a woman, a man taking charge and a woman letting it happen—consensually," she writes. "There are times I play hard to get, and Joe knows those signals. But when I am not in the mood, Joe doesn't force me to do ANYTHING."
"Accusing Joe and I of promoting marital rape diminishes the real terror and violence of a forcible act of sexual violence," she adds. "Women who are prisoners of their husband's violence have no escape from physical and psychological trauma. Playing hard to get is NOT domestic abuse."
Melissa also stands by what she wrote about needing her husband, saying, "We turn to each other for support, love, and affection. We depend on each other to raise our kids, run our home, and pay the bills…I love being married and depending on Joe, just as he loves being married and depending on me."
And on another note, if you were concerned Melissa was a little too anal about the bathroom situation at the Gorga household, fret not. "Of course, I poop in my own house! I just don't let Joe see me do it," she writes. "I keep that business to myself. You wouldn't let a man see you poop on the first date, right? That's my point. Keep the mystery alive in a marriage. Date your husband."
Fine, but do remember: Everybody poops!
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