Our Lips Are (Not) Sealed!

By Ted Casablanca Oct 18, 2006 7:19 PMTags
What has a certain über-celeb been overheard remarking about the Sumner Redstone-Brad Grey potentially nasty executive-suite sitch? And while Avril Lavigne and James Denton chat clothes, somethin' (or someone) has definitely got Teri Hatcher all hot under her Valentino collar! Read on for the dishy deets...
Nancy Kaszerman/ZUMApress.com
No, no, it’s not another new department, this start-o’-the column quote, but as you’ve noticed, I’m sure, lately my Awful Truth publisher, E! Online, has been ironing out a few kinks in its new redesign. Monday’s Blind Vice, for ince, was last week’s. But it was fixed superfast! So, please bear with us, dollfaces…

And if ya do, I promise, I just might come exquisitely close to telling you which veddy famous movie star (who does biz over at Paramount) breathed the following verbal evil quote recently. First, to bring you up to speed:

I’m sure you all know Paramount’s ancient-geezer top dawg, Sumner Redstone, of Viacom infamy, very loudly dismissed Tom Cruise from the company’s movie stables, which are, at the moment, headed by the height-challenged Brad Grey, the CEO-producer with movie star looks and a rep for being next on Redstone’s heartless chopping block. Sure ya knew.
Paul Fenton/ZUMApress.com

I mean, it’s such the old story. Per usual, Hollywood’s a hideous tank o’ over-surgeried sharks, right? Oui, oui!  Indeed, so ready for (further) bloodied waters over at the venerable studio on Melrose are they, that Mr. Mystery megastar joked, within audible earshot of several T-town types at a Biz function, that nervous honcho Grey was “just about the right height to kiss Sumner Redstone’s ass.”

 What a honkin’ hairy quote, huh? Pretty dirty of me not to tell you who said it, eh? Or did I?
The Hollywood Style Awards were held Sunday night at Pacific Design Center to honor Tinseltown’s hottest hipsters and most stylish sirens as selected by Hollywood Life mag. Everyone from bootylicious Jessica Biel to babelicious Nicollette Sheridan (presenter and award winner) came out for the glam event.
Lisa O'Connor/ZUMApress.com

I ran into Avril Lavigne—there presentin’ the Fashion Visionary award to Diesel’s Renzo Rosso—before the awards show. The sometimes-spitting gal looked rather ladylike—who knew? A.L. was lovely with her blond curls and skinny black jeans. I asked if she’d had any fashion faux pas over the years. “I don’t really regret anything,” mused the former skater-gal turned girly-girl.

 “You know, the ties and the wifebeaters and all...It had its time and place. And now I’m all grown up, and I’ve moved on,” Av-hon ‘splained, all stoic ‘n’ K-Fed reductive.
Steve Granitz/WireImage.com
As soon as the awards were given out, the after-soiree kicked off in the Young Hollywood Home, a sorta swanky space in the PDC, decked out by up-and-coming designers. Something about fruity cocktails and très expensive furniture seemed like a bad idea to moi, but I wasn’t about to miss out on chattin’ with James Denton and Teri Hatcher. (Or maybe I was…More on that later.)
I asked James, suave and handsome in his grey Valentino threads, about his biggest fashion fashion faux pas. “Actually," he replied, "I did have one: John Travolta invited me to one of his birthday parties.” Too much Scientology-sanctioned fun, right? Tell me more, James-doll!

“I hadn’t been in L.A. very long, and he just described it as being very casual,” J.D. continued. “So, I showed up in jeans and T-shirt…and it was totally Hollywood-party chic. I was the only one there in jeans, and I felt like a real fish outta water, because they were all celebrities and I was, like, D-list. I looked like the biggest bumpkin, although he assured me it was fine.”

Oh, doll, I’m sure Johnny T. didn’t mind one iota! He’s such the gracious host, n'est-ce pas? Bet he even kissed ya goodnight!
ABC/Danny Feld

Decidedly less smoochy-poo to my totally bitchin’ associate, Cristina Gibson, was Teri Hatcher.  C.G. asked Ter-babe, gorgeous in Valentino, if she could get a quick gab on.

 “Who are you with?” she asked.

 “E! Online,” Cristina replied.  

“No,” she replied, quicker than it takes Eva Longoria to get her hired help into the sack on Desperate Housewives. “Sorry. You’re a beautiful girl, but…” she apologized, before dashing off.

 Um, what the eff does that mean, exactly? Would it have helped or hurt poor Cristina’s chances of chatting if she was fugly instead? Such the cryptic answer, Ms. H. Readers, send Cristina Care Bears right now (or Teri Hatcher dolls with needles in them—take your pick).
Mark Sullivan/WireImage.com
Hmmm. Could Ms. H.’s lack of love for E! Online have anything to do with that little item we broke about her and George Clooney dating (and him so not wanting a repeat rendezvous) way back when? Hello, there’s way worse things someone could be accused of than hankering for hunky George! Hell, I do it 24/7!