Brazil's anti-prostitute ads

Brazilian Health Ministry

Happy...hump day.

And it certainly (probably) is if you're a Lifetime executive looking for controversial fodder to inspire the next Lifetime Original Movie (they have a whole channel for LMOs now!) And the controversial fodder of the moment? Prostitutes. "Perfect," a Lifetime executive somewhere whispers.

The biggest story circulating the web features the happy prostitutes of Brazil, who are probably not all that happy anymore. Because an online ad campaign titled "I'm Happy Being a Prostitute,"—which encourages condom usage and attempted to reduce the stigma of legalized prostitution—generated backlash that the ads glorified prostitution. Stigma, unreduced. Ads, pulled.

A smile will surely return to the sex working women of Brazil's faces though as the country prepares for the 2014 FIFA World Cup and the 2016 Olympics. Though prostitution is not an official Olympic sport, it is expected to be one of the more popular athletic events of the Games.

In anticipation, some prostitutes are even learning English. Talk about a learning experience!

The Lifetime Original Movie: A Brazilian Erin Brockovich-type (played by Gisele Bündchen, in her Lifetime debut) takes on the cause of protecting the prostitutes of Brazil after befriending a hard-on-her-luck prostitute (casting TBA). She takes her fight from the Brazilian brothels to the highest government to keep her new "family" healthy and happy.

Another learning experience—one they apparently don't teach you in school—took place in Minneapolis this week when an 18-year-old high school senior was accused of prostituting a younger student via an online profile.

Montia Marie Parker, the cheerleader turned madame, allegedly solicited the other student on two separate occasions and now faces charges of sex trafficking and promoting prostitution—not in the same way that Brazil was apparently trying to promote prostitution. This way is definitely illegal and very wrong. Very, very wrong.

The Lifetime Original Movie: We amp up the drama by following a high school cheerleader (played by Ashley Greene) as she runs an entire school-wide prostitution ring, before inevitably being busted. The third act is a dramatic court scene, natural. It's sad and horrible and teaches us all a lesson: Don't prostitute your peers, kids.

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