Jersey Shore


How nice of MTV to give viewers another two-hour episode of Jersey Shore, but the first hour was what one would call the calm before the storm. 

It all started with a first for the show—Snooki moved out of the shore house and into her "grandma shack" next door. She really wasn't far from the rest of her roommates (literally like 50 feet), but it was perfect space for her and her Baby Lorenzo bump. 

Mike continued to stay strong with his sobriety and decided to go to the doctor to get a shot on his toosh that would help him, but also caused him to work half-ass on his first day back at the Shore Store (get it?).

After a good amount of "ball-busting" Sitch decided to ditch work and go back home to bed. Of course, Vinny followed to give him a pep talk because that's what Vin does, and all was OK. Speaking of Mike, he just might take the relationship plunge with Paula. He said he definitely cares and respects her, and doesn't want her to walk away, but is afraid of going completely off the market. Clearly a case of FOMO (fear of missing out). 

In other relationship news, Deena continued to be emotional about her separation with Chris, but we have to admit—these two are adorable together. After a "romantical" date night, it was clear that Deena feels something special with her man, which makes her missing him understandable, but also raised a red flag to Sammi

So, according to the good friend handbook, Sam tried to give Deena some advice to lift her spirits. Unfortunately, that only resulted in Ronnie getting angry about them running late for their dinner plans. What else is new? Either way, the whole crew, minus Snooks and Jionni who were spending quality time together, went out to Captain Hooks for some games and karaoke. 

Best Performance Award goes to Mike, who gave his rendition of Amy Winehouse's "Rehab." Too soon? Nah. 

Another night, viewers were introduced to an interesting female on the boardwalk, Morgan.

Pauly D and Vinny were hanging on the top deck, enjoying the scenery, when two breasts came into the picture. Yeah, she didn't care, but it worked. Morgan went up to meet the guys, after all the roomies went up to see her boobies also, and a surprise appearance by her kooka, and we were introduced to a new word—DFA, down for anything. 

"She's not that bad, I mean, she's pretty gross, but not that bad, " Vin told us, and also made a confession that he met a special girl back home before starting the show! That's why he hasn't been picking up girls like usual. As for his bromance with Pauly—not sure where that stands.

Some tension between Roger and JWoww started brewing when he was over an hour late to his surprise birthday party at Jimbo's, but he sent his lady two dozen pink roses to apologize and that instantly got him back into the "bone zone."

Remember how we said there was a storm coming? Well, here's what went down. 

Pauly ran into his buddies Ryan Labbe and Big Jerry, who you might recognize from The Pauly D Project, while on the boardwalk, so they all plan to rage at Bamboo (although notorious for fight breakouts) with the rest of the house. Everything seemed to be going great, until Mike came into contact with his own stalker—a guy (apparently they're friends on Facebook which automatically makes them friends in real-life).

So, Paul couldn't understand why Mike wasn't giving him the time of day. In steps hotheaded Irishman Labbe, who has absolutely no tolerance for B.S., and tells the guy to "take a walk." Simple enough. But of course that wasn't the end of it. Paul was clearly upset with Ryan's interference with his attempt to bromance Mike, and approached Ryan to figure out why he did what he did. That conversation didn't go well and Labbe ended up literally throwing Paul into a bouncer. 

But that's not all! Out of nowhere, one of the show's largest brawls in history broke out. There was no clarification as to how it started or who was directly involved, but bouncers everywhere were holding the Jersey Shore guys back. Roger, however, was seeing red, and Jenni's attempt to have him calm down resulted in him shoving her into the ground. 

So she punches him in the face.

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