Morning Mail! Where Art Taylor and His Abs?

Fans wonder when they’ll get to see more of the ab-tastic Mr. Lautner, who’s kinda MIA

By Ted Casablanca Jan 24, 2012 1:03 PMTags
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Dear Ted:
We haven't seen the hunky Taylor Lautner out and about lately—not even at the People's Choice Awards. So this makes me wonder: Is he trying to keep a low profile, or is he possibly working on a new project? Or is it all just a coincidence?
—Bri Moone

Dear Twi and Twi Again:
What you're seeing with Taylor's public persona lately is all about the Twilight effect. Nobody knows better that yummy Taylor that he got totally overexposed with the Twilight franchise—and that baby ain't even over yet! So, Lautner and his peeps, all of whom want the Tay-machine to be a megastar along the likes of Tom Cruise one day know that, right now, PR economy is the best policy. In other words, no Nikki Reed-style silliness on the red carpet (and elsewhere) right now for our boy Tay!

Dear Ted:
It's amazing to me how Rob and Kristen can literally go weeks on end without being spotted or photographed. Are they really that ninja-like, or are the paps losing interest?
—Tina

Dear Now You See Me:
Chalk it up to the ninja-stuff, dear. But actually, it's not terribly hard to go unnoticed by the paps. If you want to, that is.

Dear Ted:
No, no, no! Tim Tebow is far too good to settle for any of John Mayer's leftovers. Taylor Swift lost all her "good girl" cred when she went down that road.
—Deb 

Dear Mistaken Matchmaker:
Exactly how did Taylor lose her "cred," as you put it, Deb? Are you implying there's a "Dear Tim" song coming from Taylor's sneaky song oeuvre sometime soon? Also, I think you've got it wrong. If anything, Tay's too good for Tim, who—I'm sorry—isn't quite as pure of thought as he would like the world to think. Darling, he stomps around locker rooms half naked with Neanderthal horndogs all the time, something's gotta be but rubbin' off there.

Dear Ted:
Zach Quinto, Matt Bomer, Jim Parsons, Lee Pace, they all seem to have found the recipe to have a successful career as lead actors in Hollywood and a healthy and happy private life. Do you think this new generation of smart and hot male actors will set the example for the newcomers so that they won't feel the need to sell their soul (and life) to the devil in order to have some fame?
—L

Dear Good Question:
Only to an extent. You're, of course, talking about a very exclusive club here, L, one that involves a great deal of independence and cojones, gifts the general actory crowd in Hollywood aren't exactly brimming over with.   

Dear Ted:
I am a longtime fan of yours. Do George Clooney and Matt Damon hate on Jennifer Aniston since she split with Brad Pitt?
—Aviavi

Dear Make Me Laugh:
Sweetheart, you're talking about actors. Nobody switches partners and moods and sexual persuasion more than these types! Of course, Jen's pals aren't upset with her—especially since, uh—earth to Tina—Jen didn't exactly leave Brad. Another reason there's not even an iota of truth to your query. Try again, though, you sound like an interesting questioner!