Morning Mail! Wedding Wars: Is Justin Timberlake Trying to One-Up Britney Spears?

Readers wonder if J.T.’s engagement is suspicious, following on the heels of ex Britney

By Ted Casablanca Jan 09, 2012 1:07 PMTags
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Dear Ted:
Am I the only one who thinks it's super weird and pathetic that Justin Timberlake chose to propose to Jessica Biel mere days after ex-girlfriend Britney Spears revealed her own engagement. What is he playing at?
—Jed

Dear Timing Is Everything:
Alert Mickey Mouse, Jed, ‘cause this is a Mouse House scandal! But unfortunately, not really. This time I think it's just a matter of coincidence that both happened to be taken off the market at the same time. Brit has been destined for fiancée-ship with Jason Trawick for, like, ever now, and J.T. knew he would have to do something big to win back Biel. Think maybe they'll plan their weddings together? Probably not, right?

Dear Ted:
So you are fed up with the lack of gossip on Robsten and their private lifestyle, and now are through with them. Is this your way of getting out now without making it seem that you were a part of the PR plan? We all know that in November when Breaking Dawn Part 2 is out, "Robsten" will be no more.
—Love, Nonsten

Dear Stewing the Pot:
Hardly, you nasty Nonsten! I still love me some R.Pattz and K.Stew as much as always, even if they're up to their old cat and mouse antics lately. We'll see what goes down post-B.D., but for now I'm still totally into ‘em. Viva la Robsten!

Dear Ted:
So I read somewhere that Taylor Swift is doing a song for the Hunger Games movie. Now I'm a huge fan of the books and I really don't want anything to screw up the movies. Now with that said do you think a song by Taylor will really go with it? I mean unless if a fairy tale love song for Katniss and Peeta.
—B in Alaska

Dear Get in the Game:
Not only is Swifty doing a song, B, but it's already out. You can check out "Safe and Sound" on the flick's official YouTube page. But the real question is where in the movie the ditty will fit in. My thoughts? Maybe [SPOILER ALERT] while Katniss is adorning Rue's corpse with flowers. Kinda fits, no?

Dear Ted:
I have a question about Jerry Rock-Butt. Why get married? He could have anyone he wants. Why not wait until another "true love" comes along? But I am dying to know who the voluptuous ex is. Is she perhaps African American or is she from another country?
—Molly & Audra

Dear Rock and a Hard Place:
Because, thing is, Jerry is so concerned with winning his mama's approval that he's even willing to settle down with a chick as vanilla as Chutney Jones instead of waiting for true love. As for his ex, no and no. She's a fairly famous fellow Vice star, though. Any guesses who?

Dear Ted:
This might sound silly, but I think Katy Perry didn't actually think Russell Brand was actually going to go through with filing for divorce, that it was just a big fight. It's sad because at first those two looked like such a great pairing, but I always wonder how these Hollywood couples can ever expect to have a successful marriage when you're barely ever even in the same city. Because Skype and text messages are not even a close substitute for the real thing.
—Bridget

Dear Anti-sexter:
I pretty much agree with you, but, the thing is, Bridge, they were so not a good pair. Even in the beginning—both are just in completely different mindsets that don't mesh. So that distance makes the heart grow fonder thing may have actually applied in this case.

Dear Ted:
I watched Water for Elephants last night and Robert Pattinson wasn't bad in it. I didn't watch the whole movie, because there was no chemistry between him and Reese Witherspoon. But he has other movies soon to prove himself.
—Dollie

Dear Elephant in the Room:
Totally agree, Dollie (and must admit, kinda happy to be talking about Rob the actor and not Rob the goss star for once). He is a good actor and I think he'll prove it once he's gotten enough other projects under his belt that people kinda, sorta forget about the Twilight connection. And I also agree on the lack of lovin' between Rob and Reese. Kinda surprising actually.