Lindsay Lohan

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Dear Ted:  
How obnoxious is it that Lindsay Lohan's Playboy shoot "pays tribute to Marilyn Monroe?" She already put out pics like that and they bombed, and now with My Week With Marilyn coming out it just makes Lohan look like she's trying to show that she would have been better for the part. Whatever similarities between M.M.'s and L.L.'s personal lives (drug use, for one), Marilyn Monroe was never orange, never wore cheap extensions and she had a charm and magnetism about her that Lindsay doesn't.

Dear Lo Ball:
See, it would totally be more barf-worthy if I wasn't already prepping for it. I know the moment she signed on for her Playboy gig that she'd try to ride Marilyn's coattails toward what LiLo thinks is "classiness." I don't know why she and her reps are being so shy about the nudey mag though. It isn't like we haven't already seen Lindsay's knockers and nether regions.

Dear Ted:
Brett Ratner
resigns and Eddie Murphy soon follows...interesting. Please don't disappoint us and give us some scoop!!

Dear Done and Done:
Babe, why are you looking for nasty Vice explanations (which there are, BTW) when there's a Vice playing out before your very eyes and no one is keeping their trap shut about it? Of course I mean Brett and Olivia Munn's shrimptacular shenanigans. Cannot wait until O fires back. My money's on her.

Dear Ted:
Two questions about Scarlett Johansson based on rumors I've been hearing: First, Is she shacking up with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and second, Is Martin Scorsese casting her as Marilyn Monroe in his Frank Sinatra biopic?

Dear ScarJonesing for News:
The second is more likely than the first one, at least when it comes to serious news. Scarlett can totally pull of that vampy, blonde vixen role—unlike LiLo, but we won't get into that again—but she's not looking to get involved anytime soon. She and her ex-hubby, Ryan Reynolds, have that in common.

Dear Ted:
Are Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder still together? It seems like ages since they've been out in public together at an event when for a while we saw them a lot. Do you have any gossip on a quiet breakup?

Dear They're as Hot as Ever:
Which is, to say, not very. No, these two haven't decided to go their separate ways—they're just not the hot and heavy couple that everyone thinks they are.

Dear Ted:
While most stars have fans out there, why do certain celebs seem to obtain such rabid followers who are almost obsessed with them, like Jennifer Aniston's followers? They don't know her personally but go nuts on her behalf when something questionable is said about her. Is Ms. Aniston aware of these people and their strange devotion to her, and doesn't it creep her out and maybe make her feel unsafe at times? I know I'd feel that in her shoes. What are your thoughts here?

Dear Consider the Opposite:
It's better than people saying "poor Jen" all the time, no?! And sure there's a few cuckoo crazies in the bunch, but that goes for every celeb in this town.

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