The backlash of the past 24 hours—since Kim Kardashian announced her shock divorce from her husband of 72 days, Kris Humphries—has been intense.
And while Kim largely remained mum, save for her sole statement to E! News, mama Kris Jenner is doing what all good mothers should and defending her daughter against the onslaught of ugly speculation.
Needless to say, this topic was chief among those Jenner was eager to discuss when she appeared on the syndicated Johnjay and Rich radio show this morning.
So, without further ado, take it away, Kris:
"The minute you see something in print, something written down or on the cover of a newspaper, you think, 'Oh that's true, this is what happened,' " she said when asked point-blank about rampant speculation of a media hoax, which seems to have clocked in just as many, if not more, column inches as the actual divorce news itself in the course of the past day.
"And it couldn't be further from the truth. So people have to calm down for a minute and realize no one's doing anything crazy, it's just a horrible, horrible situation. I feel bad for the kids."
"The kids," of course, being Kim and Kris, whose depiction in the press seems to have morphed from heartbroken couple to PR masterminds in record time.
But sorry to break it to you, haters. The divorce was not a decision made by Kardashian Kommittee as part of some nefarious plot to increase their media profile (as if they needed that).
Nor was it cooked up by the Kommittee's home network.
"Any insinuation that E! and producers orchestrated Kim's wedding is completely false," E! said in a statement Tuesday. "The Kardashians have authentically lived their lives on camera for a long time and Kim's wedding is one of the many real-life events that the family has shared with viewers, from Mason's birth to coping with their father's death to Khloé and Lamar's wedding."
"Kim has to make a very difficult decision," Jenner further explained, revealing that the divorce filing was news to her. "She needed to do that on her own. She's not 5 years old, she's a 30-year-old woman who, you know, definitely needs my support right now. And so whatever her decision was, at the time, I'm just here to support, you know, her as a mom and make sure she's OK."
Chief among the reasons that seem to be cited as so-called evidence that the relationship was a made-for-TV sham is the star-studded, highly hyped E! wedding special, Kim's Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event, and the presumed profits that the couple supposedly earned as a result.
According to Jenner, that's the rumor that stings the most.
"She just happens to be a very, you know, public person, with a couple of television shows on the air, so it makes it bigger than life. And the one thing is, the most annoying is the rumor that she made millions off of this wedding, and she didn't make a dime off of this wedding and actually spent millions of dollars on the wedding, so it's not something she ever thought would not be happily ever after."
As for speculation that E! itself was in on or otherwise urged the planning of the sequence of events that so surprisingly unfolded, Jenner said, "Listen, we have the most amazing network in the world, they're just really, really good to us and they feel so bad for Kim as a person. This is about a human being, it's not about a reality show."
Make that, a human being just like any other human being.
"She's not the first person in the world to get a divorce or have something like this happen to, and she's not going to be the last," Jenner said. "I can't judge her and I can't speculate for her, I can just love her. And Kim's one of these people who's got the most amazing heart in the world and so I just have to trust that she knows what she's doing, and be there for her when she needs me."
In any case, at least some good will come out of Kim's personal devastation. When asked what her daughter planned to do with all those wedding gifts, Jenner said that it was unlikely they'd be returned, but rather would go toward a much better cause.
"I'm sure Kim will make a ginormous donation to a wonderful, deserving charity or children's hospital, I think that's what's going to happen."
Now there's a silver lining.