Jennifer Aniston, Justin Theroux

Eric Charbonneau/WireImage

Dear Ted:
I wanna know why nobody is talking bout Jennifer Aniston's new relationship? Her new beau left someone for her and it's OK. When Angelina Jolie did it, it was all like Team Jen. People in glass houses, Jen! Maybe Miss Lately would like to interview the other woman on her show and have fun with Jen like she did Angie.

Dear Other Other Woman:
Uh, I think you prob mean Miss Chelsea Handler? We've discussed this before, and the timing's way iffy on whether she "stole" her man. Have a feeling he broke it off for her, but deal is, he wasn't married to his ex. The Viciness of it just isn't on the same scale, babe. At all.

Dear Ted:
Are Kristen Stewart's and Robert Pattinson's Vices a thing of the past or still on going? If still ongoing, they're clearly nothing big enough to cause a rift between them no?

Dear Double Trouble:
No, hon, this duo Vices together and stays together. Deal is, K.Stew and R.Pattz are definitely Geminis when it comes to Vicing around, forever and always. It's what makes Robsten total magnets to one another!

Dear Ted:
Two questions for you: Has Toothy Tile ever done television? I mean in the form of a documentary/special/reality show? And just for kicks: Do you know if any of the actors or actresses on the Harry Potter set have explored or are exploring the concept of fluid sexuality?

Dear TV for Toothy:
Not much, but Tooth's done a few select TV appearances. As for H.P., with all those hot young curious thangs, there was def some experimentation going on. Witch or warlock, sex is sex my dear.

Dear Ted:
Can you give us a few differences between Julie Bone Jumper and Twyla Babe Sucker's personalities or careers? They blend in way too much. I need something to distinguish one from the other.

Dear Distinguished Dirt:
Your wish is my command. Bone's more of a notorious man-thumper, but Babe likes both. That's all I'm giving you doll!

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