George Lopez, Kirstie Alley

Gavin Bond / TBS; ABC/BOB D'AMICO

Sorry, George Lopez, but your apologies are no good here.

Despite the late-night host offering a mea culpa to Kirstie Alley last night for his horribly "misjudged" attempt at humor (remind us again what's so hilarious about equating women to barnyard animals?), the feisty Dancing With the Stars contender isn't having any of his too-little, too-late niceties, and this morning flatly rejected the pig-invoker's apology.

But luckily for him, Alley laid out exactly what it would take for the comedian to make it up to both her and women everywhere. And it sounds like a pound of flesh is in order. Um, literally.

Kirstie Alley, Twitter

Twitter

"@georgelopez, I don't need or want ur apology…I want your kidney dude..on behalf of ur X and all the women uv insulted…give it back," she tweeted.

"I don't consider 'I misjudged the joke' an apology," she went on, after retweeting some encouragement and support from her followers. "Sorta like a husband saying 'I misjudged putting my dick in a whore'…sorry hon..hehe."

Well, if this whole reality show competition thing doesn't work out for Kirstie, she may have a future as a comedian. One who wouldn't have to resort to hackneyed and insulting "jokes."

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