Joan Rivers

E! Networks

Dear Joan:
Just thought I'd get a little fashion advice. What age is it appropriate to start showing cleavage? What age is it appropriate to stop?

Dear Maui Wowie:
Your cleavage shouldn't go on display until you're at least legal in all 50 states. And you'll want to think about covering up a bit more once you qualify for an AARP card. Unless you're dating Ashton Kutcher.

Dear Joan:
Is it a fashion do or don't to mix black and brown together in an outfit?

Dear Color Coordinator:
You can mix black and brown—they're both neutrals—but it needs to look like you know what you're doing and not because you can't find anything clean to wear. A black blouse with a brown print or a rich brown leather jacket with a black shirt and dark blue jeans...I know you'll find a way to make it work.

Dear Joan:
What's up with the frumpy outfits that the female dog handlers wear for the nationally televised Westminster Dog Show? I found their attire distracted from the dogs, as each ensemble was uglier than the one before!  What a mess!  I'd like your opinion, please, as I know how much you love dogs and fashion.
—Kristy Kerins

Dear Dog Lover:
Those bitches should be ashamed of themselves and I'm not talking about the dogs. There's no excuse for looking sloppy, even if you spend your day picking up poop. Step it up, ladies!

Dear Joan:
I'm from Chile and I will study law this year so I need formal clothes, but I'm 18 so I don't know what kind of clothes buy without looking older. What advice could you give me to be a young, formal and chic law student?

Dear Legal Eagle:
Think about investing in a well-tailored and feminine suit. (Somewhere between Judge Judy and Ally McBeal.) And add accessories to make the look your own. That way you'll keep it classy and modern all the same time.

Dear Joan:
Love your show and love your blue-gray jacket on the Fashion Police Oscars show. Where can I get it? Thanks.

Dear FP Fan:
Thank you, I love it too. It's from Akris. And the dress is Tahari, in case you were curious!

Email me your fashion questions at

WATCH: Fashion Police on E! Friday nights @ 10:30 p.m.

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