Andrew Garfield, Robert Pattinson

Nick Harvey/

Dear Ted:
Why oh why do you always have to link every single freaking story you do to Robsten? Trust, not everyone cares. I, for one, could not care any less about those two, and even less with the downright psycho Twi-twit comments. The little Five Things piece on Andrew Garfield could have been about a lovely English guy on the rise, but no, you had to inject it with those two Twilight people. Seriously, why? I'm pretty sure many of your pre-Twilight fans, including myself, are hanging by a thread here as far as reading your site goes. Soon enough I will be saying farewell, dear friend. You shall be missed.

Dear Nit-Twit:
OK, maybe occasionally we'll throw out a gratuitous Robsten ref or two, but c'mon—you're going to call us out on the Andrew Garfield post? Hello! It's a list of facts about the megatalented dude, and one of those facts just so happens to be that he's über-besties with R.Pattz and TomStu. No need to get your Nonsten panties in a twist.

Dear Ted:
Is Cass Stimulatia known for publicly discussing her personal hygiene and bodily function habits?

Dear Poop Scoop:
Unless you're one of her BFFs, you obviously wouldn't have heard of Cass's problems down under. But if you're one of her poor gal-pals, it's probably all you do hear about. So gross!

Dear Ted:
My beloved cat, Kisses, passed away yesterday. Can you help me dry my tears and answer two questions about Dancing With the Stars? First, do any of the pro dancers (you know, the true stars of the show) have a Blind Vice? And second, any chance Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Erin Andrews will get back together? Their latest tweets show that they are still thisclose. Hoping for a happy ending.
—Kisses Mommy

Dear Star Gazing:
No and yes. But "get back together" makes it sound like they were dating. They've always had a thing, but it was more of a hot-and-heavy fling than a long-term relaysh. Which is what both were looking for, mind you.

Dear Ted:
I was wondering if we could play a little game. I'm going to put some of my favorite Blinds in order form oldest to youngest (based on who I think they are) and you correct me if I'm wrong, OK? Dashed Dingle-Dream, Toothy Tile, Judas Jack-Off, Barrington Bang-Me, Nevis Divine, Twyla Babe-Sucker, Terry Tush-Trade. Am I good or am I good? Love ya!
—BV Groupie

Dear Just a Number:
Almost nailed it.

Dear Ted:
It looks like Alexander Skarsgård and Kate Bosworth are still very much on, judging from the tweets about the two of them at a concert. I don't see how A.Skars can be a low-key kind of guy if he's really involved with publicity hound Bosworth. Were any of the relationship breakup rumors true? I have to say that nothing about the way Skars is handling his relationship. It smacks of a PR ploy because he didn't respond to the rumors in any way. And she's missed a lot of good pap opportunities—Emmy night and the Swedish trip. And at this point, they've been together a year.

Dear Skarsworth Redux:
Things were never officially over between the two, just...well, strained. So the breakup rumors weren't true, but weren't exactly false either. But trust, they're getting plenty of promotion if they want it or not. You're asking about ‘em after all, babe.

Dear Ted:
I'm so happy to hear Anne Hathaway is not a B.V.! I love her. I'm so surprised she and Jake G. have never dated. I think she would be perfect for him.

Dear Hathenhaal:
All the chemistry between this twosome is left on the big screen. Jakey-poo definitely isn't Anne's type of guy—not that there's anything wrong with that, mind you. Not exactly Vice versa though; Anne has that edgy, good-girl vice J.G. digs in a chick.

Dear Ted:
I don't need a response, but just wanted to pass along a link in case you had not seen it yet…Brett Favre may or may not be Pepper Harthman, but it looks like trouble is headed his way. Have a great week!

Dear Brett Be Gone:
Favre may be feeling the tabloid heat, but that's exactly why he's not Pepp. You all are going with the obvious guesses. I'm telling you: There's no dirt on P.H. out there—yet, at least. The guy is one sext away from Tiger Woods status, if you ask me.

Dear Ted:
Have you noticed that K.Stew never hangs out with any girls? And I am not talking about the occasional meal with castmates, I mean real friends. Does she not have any? She's 20. She should be hanging out with girlfriends at least some of the time when she is home in L.A. Maybe if she spent some time with a group of confident girlfriends she would lose that annoying social awkwardness. What to you think?

Dear Gal Pals:
Hey, who are we to judge the gal for who she chooses to be friend with? But Kris does have gal-pals—just ask Dakota Fanning—she's just definitely a "one-of-the-guys" type of girl. Which is why she's so close with Rob's group of buds, natch.

Dear Ted:
When it comes to Glee, what are your thoughts on Charice? I mean I don't really know her, but I can't help but not like her at all. Do you think there's any chance she'll steal Lea Michele's spot as the cast's new diva and the most talented one there? I truly hope not because I love Lea—Charice not so much. Besides, looks do count on this show and Charice is way... not hot.

Dear Sunshine Dampener:
Neither here nor there on her, really. Thought she did a pretty good job in the premiere, but we haven't seen her since. But how dare you imply she even remotely challenged Ms. Lea's status as queen of the gleeks. Not by a long shot!

Dear Ted:
Do Strawberry Snort 'Em and Priscilla Desert know each other? Is there any tension between Ms. Desert and Me-Me Dallas?

Dear Feeling Pris-sy:
No and no...Why do you ask?

Dear Ted:
Any good dirt on my favorite Vampire Diaries castmember Ian Somerhalder?

Dear CW Wild Child:
Ian is the member of that cast with the least amount of juicy goss lately. If you're looking for good dirt, I suggest you check with a few of his costars first.

Dear Ted:
I can't believe that Chelsea Handler is really hooking up with 50 Cent. What is your take on it?

Dear Penny for Your Thoughts:
Straight from the funnylady's mouth Twitter, she and "Mr. Cent" are strictly biz. Hey, it might be nice for him to start hanging out with her and her posse of gay pals. Maybe then he'd get a friggin' clue.

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