John Mayer


Gotta say, Charlie, Margo and I are all so happy we moved to a new place, we decided to take a break from having a Morning Piss and be happy for a change! And what better way to celebrate than John Mayer (supposedly) taking leave from the ladies, woo-hoo!

The reason we're so ecstatic about the rather dubious news (Mayer's made this monastic claim before, remember)? Well...

Remember, the very sexually experienced musician has made no secret of his adventurous spirit when it comes to getting down with a guy. After all, having deep-kissed Perez Hilton and talked about wanting to smooch (literally) Harvey Levin's ass shows at least a modicum of thoughts about doing it dude-on-dude style.

But jeez, why only experiment with Hilton and Levin? What's the matter with say, Matt Lantner, for crap's sake? Hello, earth to perpetually horny John?

Regardless, the point is now for John to switch to using and abusing the guys, just as he's famously for doing with poor female victims like Jessica Simpson, and a little less so Jennifer Aniston.

Can't wait to hear about in all the rags, starting with this one—we want the first bitchy exclusive, Mayer boy-toy, tell us all about it!

Just like Madonna says, then a guy can experience what if feels like to be a girl—which ain't always pretty.

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