Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes, Suri Cruise

Dear Ted:
I have been reading your column since 1995 when I had a boring government job with little work to do but lots of time to read you. I meet all your best criteria: I have a rescue dog and love Robsten (including K.Stew). I have written several times over the years but have never had the pleasure of a response. Please, just this once. My questions: Why is it that Tom Cruise is almost never photographed while Katie and Suri are snapped all about town several times a week? What gives? Separate residences? Something else going on with the once united Tomkat?
Suzanne, Austin TX

Dear Old School:
Still an interest in Tommy Boy? Yeah, I confess: me, too. More and more, T.C. doesn't venture out of the Scientology buildings all that much. He really is king o' the show over there—always a major problem between him and Nicole. But he and Kate are still very much of a public-appearance type of couple, as well as a private one. They dote on Suri, and I'll say this much: Tom's fierce on his kids like no other celeb in town.

Dear Ted:
I'm a fan of Hayden Christensen. I'm curious about why he and Rachel Bilson haven't tied the knot yet after a year's engagement. They look very cute together.

Dear Wedding March:
Really? I'm not that surprised. Tell me why you're surprised. Don't quite get that.

Dear Ted:
Your Blind Vice fan blog thinks Princess Gold-Zinger is Sandra Bullock, but I think it's actually Cameron Diaz. Can you please tell me who's right?

Dear Zing and a Miss:
Sorry, doll, Cammy is an excellent guess. It could be her, actually, but it's not. Think far less talented than either Bullock or Diaz. But just as feisty!

Dear Ted:
Are you absolutely sure there is nothing going on between Emily Deschanel and David Boreanaz? Their chemistry is just too good, both on and offscreen. I know you've mentioned something about his anger, but I want to know about his love life.

Dear Didn't Say That, Exactly:
Love it when folks put words in my big mouth.

Dear Ted:
I have to agree it's a double standard to "out" Jesse and Tiger, for instance, for their sexual peccadilloes but not Toothy, etc. But it was the pieces on the side, so to speak, that went to the media. Does that mean very few of the side dishes for Toothy-type celebs go to the media? Or the media isn't interested? Wouldn't it be interesting if gay lovers ended up being more, well, tight-lipped than their straight counterparts?

Dear Tough One:
No, the media would definitely be interested. 'Tho payoffs and confidentiality agreements here and there have helped prevent it. Usually it's the side-dishes that won't or are not allowed to speak. You know how Stud-Bucket LeBeouf carries around confidentiality agreements when he steps out on his wife? Well, Toothy and the gay gang are 10 times more cautious when they do their naughty acts.

Dear Ted:
In every paparazzi video AnnaLynne McCord seems so adorable, sweet and really down to earth. Is this just an act or she is really like this in real life? Me curious!
Stefanie from Belgium

Dear Sugar and Spice:
Actually, I haven't heard very bad things about Kellan Lutz's main babe. Think she's a pretty cool girl. Just needs to cool it with all the events she goes to. We don't want a Jennifer Love Hewitt on our hands!

Dear Ted:
You've already told us that Sandra Bullock has been a B.V. My question is: Did Jesse James appear as a named character in it?

Dear Determined:
The Blind was double-sided, yes.

Dear Ted:
This is a rather a random question, but I think I'm on to her! Has Cruella St. Shackles ever been rumored to be pregnant and then nothing ever materialized? Also does she have any strange hobbies/diets (stupid question, most of Hollywood do but never mind)?

Dear Vague:
As you said, what Hollywood starlet doesn't have weird diets? But yes, Cruella most certainly does. As for the preggers stuff, something usually materializes. Then again, there are always false rumors, right? Hope that was helpful!

Dear Ted:
I know you say most of us have no idea how much of Hollywood is really gay. But I'm curious, is as much of Hollywood insatiably bisexual? I hate to think us homos have no chance whatsoever!
The heat

Dear Positive Thinking:
Sure, a lot of Hollywood is bisexual. That means you have a fabo shot then, no?

Dear Ted:
In recent months we've seen some big splits—namely Susan and Tim and Kate and Sam. So tell me...are either of these once-awesome couples Quidget and Bridget Barks-a-Little or Harry and La-Feelya Fun-Tanked?

Dear Close:
I want you to be right! Really I do. But I'm gonna have to go with no.

Dear Ted:
With June fast approaching, and press for Eclipse coming with it, could you give us a little something on Rocky Trailer?

Dear Solid Memory:
There's nothing new to report here! Rocky's been pretty under the radar. Which is very strange. Did somebody tell him to shut the hell up?

Dear Ted:
Why is everyone always so quick to cry publicity stunt? Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato have been best friends for like three years and they're not exactly lacking chemistry. I would think this would be a relationship more likely to last than one like say, Joe and Camilla, where it seemed like they met and became a couple within the span of a few days. So what if Demi came clean in a radio interview? She babbled adorably and sounded giggly and in love. And hell, if I were dating Joe Jonas, I'd want to talk about how adorable and perfect he is too. She may be a celeb, Ted, but she's also a 17-year-old girl.

Dear Fantasy Land:
I don't necessarily think it's a publicity stunt. Hell, this group of Disney friends can't keep their hands off each other. They're like Twilight types, only with mouse ears! Give it a while and Demi will be dating Miley.

Dear Ted:
You so often bash the "fatty actresses" that gain weight. What about Luke Wilson? My goodness that boy is huge on his commercials. Why aren't you bashing him about his weight gain?

Dear BS Detector:
I don't think I'm too quick to bash the fatty actresses. Russell Crowe anyone? I guess Luke's looking a little tubby, but I never found him that attractive to begin with. I think he looks better a little...rounder.

Dear Ted:
I noticed that Ashley Greene has been sporting some major bling on a particular finger. Any story behind this, or is she just looking for a little attention?

Dear Wedding Bells:
Definitely. If the ring was there with a purpose we'd all be reading about it in a tabloid exclusive by now.


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