Rot Girl Winter: Everything You Need for a Spendidly Slothful Season

If you're in your hibernating homebody era, you need to check out these must-have picks — from a pregnancy pillow (yes, you read that right) to a heated foot blanket — for a perfect rot girl winter.

By Jenny Lee Dec 08, 2023 11:45 PMTags
Shop Rot Girl WInter EssentialsE! News Illustration / Photos Courtesy of Amazon, Bedsure

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Ah, December. The year is slowly coming to an end, and the holidays are just around the corner. You deserve a round of applause (or a little "treat yo'self" day of shopping) for making it through 2023, from the good to the bad to the downright bizarre moments. As magical as the winter season is, it can sometimes be a lot to deal with, and we totally get it if all you want to do is hide away in your home until the colder days pass and the sun goes back to staying out for a reasonable amount of time again. The TikTok girlies get it, too, specifically the TikTok girls who are choosing to "rot" the winter away.

If hot girl summer brought us the Stanley cup, rot girl winter brings us an attachable snack bowl so we can sip & munch with minimal effort while binge-watching our fave Christmas movie. If sad girl autumn brought us sweater weather, rot girl winter brings us a wearable blanket hoodie featuring adorable cats & corgi butts. We're not entirely sure what spring showers will bring us, but rot girl winter has us prepared to turn those showers into a spa day with aromatherapy steamers. Long story short, rot girl winter is all about prioritizing our comfort; it's about getting cozy and embracing our inner homebody as we hibernate & wait for sunnier days.

If you're ready to join us as we embark on this wondrous journey of rotting, let's get shopping!

Pharmedoc U-Shape Full Body Pillow

OK, yes, technically this full body pillow was designed for pregnant individuals, but the unparalleled comfort and support it provides is universally appealing (especially for those of us rotting away in our beds all winter). The U-shape helps cushion your back, hips, knees, neck, and head, and the pillow also features a detachable extension that can be used as its own full body pillow or attached to the main body for added support.

My Year of Rest and Relaxation: A Novel

If you want to escape into the fictional world of rot girl winter, the TikTok-viral My Year of Rest and Relaxation: A Novel is about to be your new literary obsession.

One Amazon shopper called it the "Best book I've read in a while," writing, "Absolutely loved this book. It was a page turner, finished in just a couple days and I can't wait to read more of her work. Out of curiosity I read over some of the 1-star reviews. Clearly those who disliked this book missed the point or (understandably) felt it made them depressed reading it. The narrator is intentionally very unlikeable possibly only for the fact that we can all see ourselves in her a little bit which probably makes most people extremely uncomfortable. If you've ever been depressed some of it will resonate with you like it did for me like the desire to just sleep away the pain. If you can handle the unlikeability of the main character it definitely leads you to question those feelings and examine what makes her so upsetting. I almost want to reread it immediately."

Scrubzz Disposable Rinse Free Bathing Wipes

If you're just hibernating in the comfort of your home, do you really need to shower every single day? If you agree that the aceptable answer can sometimes be "No," these rinse-free bathing wipes are the perfect justification. Simply put a little water on the sponge, work into a lather, cleanse, and dry — no rinsing needed!

Neutrogena Hydro Boost Facial Cleansing Towelettes + Hyaluronic Acid

On that note, if you're feeling a little too slothy to do your entire multi-step skincare routine (both morning and night) every day of rot girl winter, we've got you covered with these Neutrogena facial cleansing towelettes. Made with 100% plant-based cloth, these wipes combine hyaluronic acid and a triple emollient blend to melt away impurities while boosting hydration in your skin.

Ember Temperature Control Smart Mug 2

This Ember mug will have you feeling like Goldilocks every day,one sip at a time. Pair the temperature control mug with the Ember app to customize your perfect sipping temperature, presets & more; the mug is functional even without the app and remembers your last-used temperature. Plus, the smart mug senses when to turn on and off, entering sleep mode when empty or after two hours of inactivity.

Can't Adult Today: A Snarky & Slightly Sweary Coloring Book for Adults

Tired of adulting? Rot girl winter says don't. Relax and rewind with this snarky (& slightly sweary) coloring book that's full of delightfully sassy illustrations. From floral and tropical patterns to butterflies, muchrooms & more, this coloring book provides just the perfect amount of humor and stress relief.

Bedsure Sherpa Fleece Printed Short Wearable Blanket Hoodie

Get cozy and fully embrace your inner cat lady this winter with Bedsure's wearable blanket hoodie. The outer flannel fabric and inner sherpa lining provide optimal warmth and softness, and the design means you can keep your arms free to engage in other rot-girl-winter activities while staying bundled up. It's also worth noting that this hoodie comes in multiple solid colors and other prints (like corgis, Santa, fried eggs, strawberries, avocados & more).

Marnur Heating Pad Electric Foot Warmer

If regular socks aren't keeping your toes toasty and cozy, this electric foot warmer is just what the rot-girl-winter doctor ordered. Slide your cold feet into the wide opening for full, ultra-soft coverage that warms you up faster than a regular blanket. The heating pad can be flexibly applied on your feet, back, shoulders, abdomen, legs & more, depending on where you need soothing heat.

Reacher Grabber Tool

You've just settled into your mountain of blankets on the couch, ready to binge your fave show with yumy snacks right next to you and hot beverage in hand, when you realize you forgot to grab the remote. This realization can totally ruin the cozy vibe in an instant, which is why we present to you the Reacher Grabber Tool. Reach, grab, and pick up items far away without having to get up from your seat; need we say more?

Huanuo Portable Lap Laptop Desk with Pillow Cushion

As you can probably tell by now, one of the goals for a successful winter rot is spending as much time in bed, on your couch, or any other lounging space as possible. This laptop desk will help you be a champion rotter as you binge-watch Christmas movies, work from home, and of course, do plenty of online shopping. The desk features an anti-slip wrist pad, storage pocket, and tablet holder, along with a sturdy platform and cushioned pillow for maximum comfort.

EyeVac Home Touchless Sensor Activated Vacuum

Speaking of tools to help you stay as stationary as possible, this top-rated EyeVac sensor-activated vacuum makes sweeping a snap by eliminating the need for a dustpan. Using infrared technology, this smart bin senses when dirt, dust, and crumbs are in front of it and automatically pulls them into its easy-to-clean bin. Did we mention that it's currently at its lowest price of the season for 46% off?

Gaiatop Space Heater

A space heater, but make it chic. Featuring an ultra-quiet design with safety features like the tip-over switch, this ceramic heater is as functional as it is cute. It's available in four colors that seamlessly blend with your other decor, and it has three heating modes that quickly warm up your space to just the right temperature.

Plufl The Original Human Dog Bed

What would make rot girl winter better? Spending it cuddling with your precious fur baby! Plufl's signature human dog bed is the ultra-cozy sanctuary you won't regret splurging on whether you have a pupper or kitty to cuddle with or not. The bed is designed with sensory-relieving features, like the built-in 360° pillow bolster that cradles your back, to help reduce stress and anxiety, according to the brand. It features a high-grade memory and orthopedic foam base, and it even folds in half for easy storage and transport!

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Body Restore Shower Steamers Aromatherapy - Pack of 15

Elevate your winter hibernation by turning your shower routine into a spa day with these shower steamers, available in five enchanting scents/moods and two variety packs. Relief, the most popular option, features eucalyptus & mint scents to help you wash away all the stress and fatigue from the day to get you ready for a relaxing night of rest.

Naipo Foot Spa Bath Massager

Keep the home spa vibes going with this foot bath/massager, which provides rhythmic vibration, massage rollers, and heating functions for an all-around luxurious experience. It's also equipped with a bright digital display, easy controls, noise reduction system, and overheating protection features.

Pure Daily Care NanoSteamer Large 3-in-1 Nano Ionic Facial Steamer

Take your self-pampering routine to the next level with this facial steamer & humidifier. According to the brand, the device generates nano-ionic steam by combining a conventional heating element with an ultrasonic vaporizer for steam that more effectively penetrates skin. The steamer also doubles as a room humidifer and comes with an extra chamber for warming towels along with a bonus, five-piece skin kit.

CordaRoy's Chenille Bean Bag Chair

Why have just a regular chair in your living room when you could have a giant bean bag that converts into a full-size bed that's perfect for movie nights or guests joining you for rot-girl-winter slumber parties? The soft, plush microfiber cover features a durable, woven backing and is safe for the washer and dryer.

Mzoo Sleep Eye Mask

Hit the snooze button and nap away the days in peak comfort with this bestselling sleep eye mask that has 70,700+ five-star Amazon reviews and comes in seven colors. The mask is designed to eliminate pressure on the eyes and a fully adjustable buckle strap so you can block out the lights without bothering your eyes.

Gorilla Grip Bath Pillow for Tub

Make your bathtub as comfortable as your bed with this luxurious and soft bath pillow. It features seven strong suction cups to ensure that it stays in place while you lounge, and it's designed with two inches of thick, plush foam that delivers optimal support for your head, shoulders, neck, and back.

Meeti Snack Bowl for Stanley Cup

Stay hydrated while munching away on yummy goodies with this convenient snack bowl that securely fits onto your Stanley cup. From movie to football game nights, this nifty attachment keeps your snacks within easy reach at all times, featuring three sections for different kinds of snacks (love that for us).

Dingerjar Divided Serving Tray with Lid and Handle

If you're serious about your snack time, this portable snack platter will take your munchie game to the next level. The divided compartments will keep your snacks easily accessible and organized, while the lid and handle are perfect for storing any leftovers or securely transporting your snacks from one room to another in one go.

Elephas Mini Projector for iPhone

Turn any room into a movie theater with this mini projector that's perfect for rotting away the winter from the comfort of your home while watching your favorite shows (or TikToks). The portable projector comes with a mini stand, carry bag, and portable power station support, making it convenient for indoor or outdoor use.

OluKai Genuine Shearling Slipper

If you're looking for a cozy pair of shoes to live in for the rest of rot girl winter, OluKai's signature, bestselling Ku'i slippers are just what you need and more. Made from soft, full-grain leather and lined with genuine double-face shearling, these slippers work as both house slippers and cozy slip-ons (you know, for those quick coffee runs before you come back to hibernate some more).

Premier Plush™ Blanket

Our shopping editor swears by Big Blankets, and right now, you have the chance to snag one for 47% off! The Premier Plush™ Blanket is made from ultra-plush, breathable microfiber material that will make you feel like you're enveloped in a warm cloud. From morning cuddles to afternoon naps and late-night movie marathons, this blanket is an absolute rot-girl-winter essential.

MerryXD Chubby Blob Seal Pillow

If you're looking for a winter cuddle bestie that passes the winter rot vibe check, we'd like to introduce you to this Blob Seal stuffed animal. It's the perfect size and shape for snuggling or using as a pillow. It's like if a Squishmallow went through a rot-girl-winter era.

If you want to be festive while still embracing the comfiness of "rot girl winter," check out these 30 ugly Christmas sweaters that ship fast — just in time for all those last-minute holiday parties!

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