There's an ugly side that comes with unmasking murderers and unsolved mysteries.
But no one knows that better than YouTuber Bailey Sarian, who has made a living off of blending beauty and true crime together with her Murder, Mystery & Makeup series. And while she loves what she does—don't get it twisted—she recently shared how covering these grisly topics can weigh heavy on her noggin.
"It's easy to get stuck in the dark hole and spiral," she told E! News in an exclusive interview. "For me, it's a week of researching the story, the killer, this horrible incident and writing it. And then, I rinse and repeat."
She added, "There are days where I'm like, 'Nothing is safe, nothing is good.' But it's reminding myself that it can't control my life."
While Bailey said finding a balance between unplugging and creating content has been hard, it's simple pleasures like taking walks, journaling, watching something funny or hanging out with friends that have helped her turn it off.
But even then, she admitted there's this fear that "everyone's going to abandon you."
"You log into social media and there's constantly new content, so you start comparing yourself," the Dark History podcast host explained. "And sometimes there will be comments that tell you: 'I wish you would upload more, do more.'"
She continued, "And you're like I'm trying. I'm giving all that I can give right now and it's still not good enough?"
Despite the feedback from followers, Bailey said she's prioritizing her wellness this year.
"I'm giving myself breaks," she put it simply. "And I truly enjoy what I do, but forcing myself to shut down, turn off the phone, turn off social media and give myself time to do something else is going to be beneficial. And I hope that plays a big part in keeping me healthy."
Of course, makeup is not only a form of self-care for the influencer but also a passion. And it's no surprise she recently partnered with Ipsy as their February Glam Bag X curator and selected a handful of beauty products for fans to try.
"You just feel your best when you take time to do a five-minute look," Bailey shared. "Even if it's just skincare and sunscreen, it can make you feel better. I want people to feel good about themselves and that's exactly what I tried to do with this collab."
Here's to looking and feeling our best from the inside out.