Rachel Bilson wants to clear the air.
Back in June, The O.C. star reflected on her July 2020 breakup with Bill Hader on her Broad Ideas podcast, noting, "I could not leave my house, you know what I mean? I had nothing else to do but sit in it, and deal with it and feel it. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever done, harder than childbirth."
But Rachel—who shares daughter Briar Rose, 7, with ex Hayden Christensen—is now clarifying: She wasn't comparing the split itself to the life-changing event, but rather commenting on the complexity of life during the COVID-19 lockdown.
"I said it was during a time where you could not leave your house," she said during the Aug. 31 episode of the Call Her Daddy podcast. "You had to sit in whatever it was that you were going through. So, I had to deal with this, I had to deal with being alone and taking care of my kid and everything else."
As Rachel explained, "Being isolated and not being able to connect with any humans, not being able to help myself," led to an experience with depression. "Like all of these things—that time having to force facing all of your s--t," she shared. "I said was harder than childbirth."
In fact, Rachel noted that there are very few instances you can compare childbirth to.
"Is there anything more painful? F--k no," she shared. "Maybe kidney stones—definitely a close second. But like, no, I didn't say that. All breakups are hard. Especially when you're in something that you're really into and things happen. You know, things change. There was a pandemic. There were so many things going on. So, it was a hard time."
The actress—who first sparked rumors of a romance with the Barry actor after the two were photographed on a coffee date in late 2019—noted that due to the pandemic, their breakup didn't happen "in person," but also called the split itself an "almost blessing in disguise."
"Having to be alone with all of the s--t, and your thoughts, I had to look at everything," she shared. "It gave me that time to really do things for myself."
As for the reason behind the split? "I think it was the stress of the situation of the world that led to it," Rachel said. "No one knew how to be or how to react and I think it was just a result of that. The stress of it all."
But the Jumper actress has come out of that difficult time with a new outlook on life.
"I was happy I was forced to sit in the pain or the hurt, you know," she shared. "All the feelings that came along with it, because I got to get through it."