The Most Jaw-Dropping Succession Season 3 Insults

Season three of HBO's Succession ends tonight! So let's look back at the many insults the Roy family has dished out.

By Alyssa Ray Dec 13, 2021 12:15 AMTags
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We get it, Succession season three may be the most hilariously savage one yet.

Thus, we're sad to see the HBO hit conclude its third season tonight, Dec. 12. So, as we head into the finale, let's look back at the best insults and jabs the Roys have thrown at one another this season. For those who need a refresher, this chapter of Succession kicked off with son Kendall (Jeremy Strong) and father Logan (Brian Cox) once again at each other's throats.

This civil war came about thanks to Kendall's double-crossing decision at the end of season two, where he exposed his father for knowing about misconduct and other wrongdoings in the company. And while Logan wanted Kendall to "f--k off" this season, the former heir apparent has mostly refused to back down, providing plenty of opportunities for family fights. (Though one recent face-off has left us worried about Kendall, but we digress.)

One of our personal favorite burns occurred back in episode four, "Lion in the Meadow," in which Kendall and Logan were forced to reunite to appease a panicked shareholder, played by the brilliant Adrien Brody. During a hike with the warmly-dressed shareholder, Logan had a health crisis, but Kendall only seemed to focus on business.

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When Roman (Kieran Culkin) heard about the incident, he called his brother and ripped him a new one: "You tried to assassinate our dad with the sun. Do you have a fetish for nearly killing dad? Like just the tip, but for, like, killing dad?"

Peter Kramer/HBO

Vicious, right? Well, that's just a taste of this season's iconic writing, as the rest of the cast—including Sarah Snook, Alan Ruck, Nicholas Braun, Matthew Macfadyen and J. Smith-Cameron—have also dished out some epic lines.

For a closer look at the best burns from Succession's third season, scroll through the gallery below.

"I'm going to grind his f--king bones to make my bread"

-Logan about Kendall

“That disingenuous little f--kdoll”

-Shiv about Kendall

“You wanna suck my d--k?”

-Logan to Roman

(Shout to Roman's response: "… is what he said to his son as the sexual assault allegations poured in.")

"Logan is gonna fire a million poisonous spiders down your d--kie"

-Tom to Greg

"You love showing your pee pee to everyone but someday you're actually going to have to f--k something"

-Shiv to Roman

"You tell yourself you’re a good person, but you’re not a good person"

-Kendall to Shiv

"F--k you, plastic Jesus"

-Shiv to Kendall

"You’re a national f--king prick"

-Kendall to Connor

"Tell them to f--k off"

-Logan about the FBI

"I feel another million drain with every cluck from that henhouse"

-Logan about Marcia

"Conference call jokes are just the best jokes, huh?"

-Roman to Kendall

"F--king King Kong come out to dance for me"

-Josh to Logan

"I’d castrate you and marry you in a heartbeat"

-Tom to Greg

"The f--king demented piss mad king of England"

-Roman about Logan

"Kerry, get Shiv a f--king medal"

-Logan to Kerry about Shiv

"Crap hands"

-Roman about Connor

"That’s like a haunted scarecrow asking out Jackie Onassis"

-Tom to Greg

"Hey, Ken, may we please step inside your mental disorder?"

-Roman to Kendall

"Are you a sicko?"

-Logan to Roman

"You’ve won, because you’re corrupt and so is the world"

-Kendall to Logan

The season three finale of Succession airs tonight, Dec. 12 at 9 p.m. ET on HBO and HBO Max.

(A version of this story originally published on Nov. 14 at 12 p.m. PT)

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