In the caption of a topless maternity photo that revealed her baby bump, Lauren—who shares 2-year-old daughter Alessi with her husband Arie Luyendyk—wrote how her new pregnancy is much different from her previous experiences.
"this time around has been different to say the least," the 29 year old wrote. "the darkness that surrounds a loss is something not easily forgotten. the months of mourning, the months of hoping, to now, moments of worry. even in the midst of something as beautiful as new life, that darkness finds its way in to remind me that it did in fact exist. it's tarnished the blissful ignorance i gleefully experienced the first time around."
She continued, "with all of that said, i'm proud of this body and what we've endured together. i'm proud of my second & third babies for growing so well and grateful for all the reminders they send me saying, 'mom, we're okay'. i'm proud of my journey through the darkness, because without that, the light i see now wouldn't shine quite so bright."
The news came seven months after the two announced that Lauren suffered a miscarriage.
"We made so many plans," the pair shared in the description of a YouTube video they posted in May of last year. "We bought a new house with more space, we planned how we wanted to tell you all and we envisioned our future with Alessi's little brother/sister. We were planning to share our journey through pregnancy with you, but unfortunately we didn't get the happy story we had hoped for."
Now, it seems Lauren is finding a way to look back on this painful time in her life and see the "light" in the darkness.