Well this season of The Bachelor has taken a turn.
Tonight's episode of Matt James' journey to find love took a little detour into some nasty territory thanks to the unexpected arrival of five new women. They're literally just five more contestants who didn't arrive on night one and instead are arriving now. Why? Well, that answer became apparent as soon as the original women got wind of what was happening. They lost their damn minds and decided to ruin some lives, and we're ready for Matt to send home a whole bunch of them after the way they're currently behaving.
In addition to that, tonight's episode featured a truly insane convo between Katie and Victoria, a date where all of the women were dressed as squirrels and competing in an obstacle course (not much more to say about that, honestly, but it was wild), and a first date that might have been one of the greatest first dates this show has ever seen.
First, we must discuss Katie and Victoria.
We're honestly sick of talking about Victoria but we truly could not believe we were hearing and must relay it to you.
Basically, the women were all gathered on those small couches to debrief after Sarah left and Victoria was all "the trash just took itself out." Katie spoke up and asked Victoria to stop talking like that, since Sarah was gone and there was no need to be so mean. Victoria told Katie to shut up, and then later Victoria pulled Katie aside to discuss Katie's behavior.
We transcribed the whole convo here, and you should absolutely save it if you're ever in need of a scene for an acting class or inspiration for a new reboot of Mean Girls.
Victoria: I just really didn't like when you shut me down during conversation and I feel...
Katie: Are you talking about today when you were calling Sarah names?
Victoria: When I said 'the trash took itself out?' I just would love an apology, because...
Katie: You're not gonna get an apology.
Victoria: You told me to stop when I wasn't done expressing myself.
Katie: Expressing yourself and name-calling are two different things.
Victoria: Um, well, I can do whatever I want. And I can express myself with name-calling when I choose to.
Katie: If that's how you wanna express yourself and if you wanna be toxic and rude, go for it.
Victoria: Yeah, and if you wanna express yourself with your dildo and think you're ready for an engagement, you can do that.
From there, Katie defended her vibrator and said Victoria was being a bitch, and Victoria denied being a bitch, and we simply couldn't handle it. The audacity of that convo!
We barely had time to get over that before things took yet another turn. Chris Harrison made the incredible choice to interrupt Matt's cocktail party chat with Victoria to pull him out to the driveway and shock him with five new women. Matt looked stressed before and he looked extra stressed now as the new ladies emerged from their limo, but his stress was nothing compared to what was happening inside the house.
At first, all the original ladies assumed that Sarah had returned, so they were mad about that. Then when they saw what was actually happening, they lost their damn minds. A war was immediately declared between the "OGs" and the new women, and of course Victoria was leading the charge alongside Anna.
After the squirrel date, they set their sights on new girl Brittany after Brittany tried to steal Matt away from Anna (AKA the exact same thing every contestant on this show is supposed to do), which led Anna to reveal her suspicions that Brittany might be an escort based on her maybe knowing some rich men in Chicago.
Brittany was a little flabbergasted while Anna and Victoria laughed and laughed, with some extra laughter from Jessenia and a few of the other women. Katie did her best to shut it down, but it didn't really help. What might help, however, is the fact that she went to Matt to fill him in on what's happening. Obviously, we have to wait for that storyline to continue next week.
Meanwhile, Matt dared to take new girl Michelle on a one-on-one and seemed to enjoy the greatest date of his life. They went on an adventurous scavenger hunt and then had dinner in what looked like a car museum and it felt like we were genuinely watching two people fall in love. Matt even commented on how crazy it was that his connection with Michelle was already so much stronger than his connection with other women who had been there for weeks, so hopes are high for Michelle. Score one for team newbie.
For now, while we wait to find out what happens with the Brittany rumor, scroll down to keep up with who's still in the running for Matt's heart!